The Washuk Boys

surrounded by testosterone

2012-01-11T13:51:00.000-08:00

I am outnumbered. The Washuk boys are keeping me on my toes with their manly aggression and intensity. The twins are, gasp, almost nine months! Their personalities are starting to shine through, and I am beginning to feel a tad concerned that I am going to have a wild bunch of boys! In the last month they have mastered sitting up unsupported, have started to eat more and more solid food (favorites are apples, avocado and yogurt) and are starting the motions of crawling. Will is by far the more aggressive, constantly stealing toys from his brother, and getting in to anything within a 5 foot radius. I leave him alone for a minute and return to find him playing with Eddie's hockey sticks and Star Wars figures. Clark has this tremendous intensity - evident in his stare and also the activity of his inactivity (when he is lying still he flexes every muscle and when he is sitting "still" he is constantly kicking and twitching). Overall he is better at sitting and playing with toys, whereas Will needs to be on the move. I am going to go out on a limb here and guess that Clark will be more fine-motor and Will gross-motor. Yes, my monozygotic, DNA-sharing twins are alike yet oh so unique. Will is more happy-go-lucky, and Clark more serious, pensive and a tad of a complainer. Clark took to eating solids better at first; now Will has 6 teeth in and he is eating more, but seems to have a harder time with textures. Coughed up his cous cous and carrots last week and just now gagged on what seemed to be a thread from a spinach leaf that sneaked thru the strainer. My life is about to get pretty maddening as they are on the cusp of crawling and the days of leaving one alone while I go put the other down for a nap seem to be near over. They are still sleeping in our room in two pack-n-plays, and we are still not getting much sleep with 2-3 wakings a night from each. In general, Will sleeps better at night; Clark better during the day. Clark has taken to sleeping in our bed with us for the last couple months. Hey, whatever works, right?

Eddie's personality is really shining through strong these days as he asserts himself as the man in the house. He tells us where we can and cannot sit, for example, pushing his Dad out of his favorite chair. He feeds himself, opening the fridge and grabbing whatever he pleases, consuming an average of 4 apples a day. His speech is improving with more and more intelligibility as he says things like "I don't think so," "I want ___, NOW! (complete with arm folding with he says now! and the ever popular "Stop!" such as "Mom, can you make the babies stop crying?" He is already quoting movie lines, to his Dad's praise. And he can sing the "Star Spangled Banner" and "Jingle Bells," Oh, the theme to Caillou is also a fav. He loves to pretend play. Right now his world is still consumed with acting out Santa and Prep & Landing elves, but he also plays Toy Story and Star Wars. He still loves his two baby dolls. They go with him everywhere - to school, Navy Pier, doctor's office, park, etc. He talks to them non stop. We now have him in speech therapy twice a week; the diagnosis is moderate articulation and phonological processing disorder. He is making great strides and likes to use the IPad in therapy...looks like we'll be buying one soon. He is also in to playing with Playdough (he pretends he's baking cookies or going to the movies and eating popcorn) and of course still obsesses about hockey. Santa brought him some new hockey figures and they are all the rage! He is anxiously anticipating some snow. He goes to school two days a week now at Creme de la Creme, from 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. and he is doing very well socially and emotionally. Academically, well, let's just say he are still working on numbers, colors and letters. Again, I am surrounded by testosterone and beginning to feel like my hopes of sitting and doing craft projects with my kids seem like pipe dreams. Jealous of those of you with daughters....but of course feel very blessed to have my boys!

brothers!

2011-07-26T10:06:00.000-07:00

Finally a picture of all three!

The twins are just over 3 months now and finally I am seeing glimpses of brotherly love. Eddie is starting to interact with them as they are becoming more comfortable at sitting up in the bouncy seat and propped up in chairs. Just this morning he was placing his blankie over Will's face and then pulling it off, both of them giggling; okay, so Will is not really giggling yet but he was all smiles. The twins have turned a corner within the last couple of weeks, not always needing to be held and getting more independent; they like to lay in the bassinet in our family room and play with the rings/baby gym, and they can spend increasingly more time in the bouncy seat, watching Eddie play. They smile and coo so much now. But the last few weeks, I would say ever since after the 4th of July, they have also become increasingly fussy. There seems to be no rhyme or reason to the fussiness as it occurs at various times of day and not in response to anything directly or indirectly, so I am starting to think it is due to stuff beyond our control, namely growth spurts and teething. Yes, the drooling has begun! They are both apt at sucking their fists. I have been putting Will in bibs this week. He is by far the fussier baby, but they flip-flop in their temperament; one day Will will have a bad day, the next day Clark. When Will is fussy he gets stiff as a board and you must hold him outward. He refuses to nurse, so I have to have a bottle on the ready because sucking on the bottle's teat is the only thing that calms him down. Clark is the more consistent nurser; but he has shown glimpses of the Will-fussiness as he refused to nurse a couple times on Sunday night. This is tough on me because Eddie never had a so called nursing strike; the boob always soothed him. But it doesn't seem to last long and I strategically nurse them directly after they wake up and when they are drowsy because they always seem to nurse then. Will seems to need the room dark and quiet to effectively feed and not be distracted; he is ready to take in the world! Both babies love the bath and water seems to soothe them.

Needless to say, sleep has been more challenging the past month too. There has been more night waking and tougher times with going down for naps. It feels like I am constantly either putting a baby down or responding to a wakened baby. Thank god for the swing! I try not to let them sleep in it, but sometimes it is all that works. In general they have been waking up 2-3 times a night, which is tough because there are two of them and it literally means I am in a semi-awake state all night long, often falling asleep while nursing in the chair. But last night Will slept from 9 p.m. to 5 a.m. - whoa! This is hopefully something that will become more consistent. Both can roll over from front to back now, and Will is doing it a lot lately. I often find him awake on his back. Last week marked the last of them sleeping together, which I was slightly saddened by. It was so cute to see them sleeping together; the last night we had them in the same bed we found Will sucking on Clark's hand! But they are moving around so much now and need their own space, not only so that they do not awaken the other but more so for developmental reasons, I think. They are learning how to maneuver their body and need the space to do so.

Summer is slipping away and it feels like we have hardly had one, since most days we are stuck inside tending to babies. Even going for a walk in the evening is a challenge because of nap schedules and fussiness. Getting dinner made, baths prepared and putting all three to bed is an exhausting process that seems to start at 5 p.m. and end at 9 p.m. But we are looking forward to our trip to Maine in August, to have some genuine summer fun and see all the cousins!

1 month...almost 2

2011-05-31T12:12:00.000-07:00

Taking a breathe as my three boys nap...contemplating lying down too, but the twins are due up soon as they have been sleeping for three hours now. Amazing how much there is I want to share...where to begin....I am tired and just tried to spell the word amazing with an "I." Clark and Will still look so different (un-identical) to me, although there are moments when they are both sleeping or when they are both feeding, resting on my breast and looking up at me with their big, powerful eyes, that I admit they do look like twins. Clark is starting to fill out more, more in the cheeks and legs, and more of a double chin; he is starting to catch up to his big brother. Hair is falling out, but what remains is brown and could at time seem curly/wavy. The new hair coming in looks blond and straight though. Hmm. Regardless, everyone who sees them do agree that they look so much like E4 did as a baby. Will's complexion is fairer than Clark's. Clark looks a little more like I did as a baby, or so claims my mother. We call him Clarkie or Clarkenwell (from this random song called "Bathtime in Clarkenville") and say that he is a gentleman, a chap, a looker and the charismatic one. Will we call Billy, Billiam, and my favorite: Wilbur. He IS my Wilbur or my Wildebeast. Will is more of the eater, lingering on the breast for hours and always rooting to indicate he wants more. Often I say he is faking it and a manipulator, because he roots when other people are holding him in order to get returned to his mom. He is a mama's boy, through and through and will often freak out when I am away. His cry seems to escalate quicker at times. But overall he often seems more chill, more at ease and can sleep longer...I dunno, the sleep thing seems to change every day. One day Will sleeps better and the next day Clark does. But they both sleep consistently well during the night, waking only 1-2 times. I am trying to transition myself from sleeping the entire night in the chair with them, to sleeping some of the night in the bed. For the last two nights we have successfully started them off in their bed from 9 - 1 a.m. Then I feed them in the chair and either we stay there or we try to put them back down and sometimes they end up back in our bed with us. Clark hiccups a lot. Clark stares into your soul. He wakes up happy, doesn't need to eat right away, just likes to stare at you or out the window for a bit before he has his breakfast. He likes to dance or be walked around. But neither of them have faired well on walks or car rides, much like their brother. They seem to want to eat all the time and when they are in their car seats or stroller they freak out because they aren't close enough to their food source.

Why/how do I create such needy, intense babies? I have asked myself this question a lot lately. Or rather, why do we, Eddie 3 and I, create these temperamental creatures who crave affection/human touch and startle easily? They are no where near as fragile as E4 was and can be put down to sleep quite well (yes, I am actually putting them down for naps drowsy but awake at times!!!), but they are still definitely not EASY babies. Whatever EASY is. Anyway, I ask this and then I witness my husband throwing a diaper onto the floor in the middle of the night in a rage because the strap on it broke, and I smile, realizing how easily we both can escalate to frustrated in stressful situations. Somehow I have not been pushed to my limit yet....I repeat, yet. But I have to report that E3 is struggling to remain calm lately, mostly in response to E4's antics. Yes, our E4 went from handling the babies very well in the first month to a complete terror in the 2nd month. He wants to nurse constantly, asking for "mama milk" anytime only one baby is nursing or he sees an open opportunity, i.e. I am sitting down. He has been misbehaving in general, doing things like throwing shoes around, kicking the babies bassinet and being very loud with slamming doors or banging toys. If you tell him not to do something, he does the exact opposite. It is very draining. I feel very drained. Ok, maybe I should lay down.

the arrival of will and clark

2011-04-21T14:08:00.000-07:00

It has been one month and finally had a moment to post the birth story!

Birth, the act of giving life, is such an incredible, powerful emotional and physical experience that I'd like to believe that even an atheist would be convinced of a higher power after giving or witnessing a natural birth. And so when my doctor told me that it was likely I was going to have to be induced, instead of letting that higher power and nature dictate the birthdate of my twins, I was less than enthused. At 36 weeks and a day (Thursday April 7th) my doctor told me that my blood pressure was rising and there was too much protein in my urine, signs of pregnancy-induced hypertension with risk of preclampsia. They ran some additional tests on my liver enzymes and platelets that day and luckily after spending close to 8 hours in the doctor's office and triage, we were sent home. I had to then collect my urine for 24 hours and return on Monday. On Tuesday the 12th he called me around 11 a.m. and said that my urine still had a significant amount of protein in it and so we were going to induce today. I said, "ok, when should I come in?" He said "now." E4 was in school, so my Mom drove me to the hospital and Eddie left work and met me there. We were admitted into a labor and delivery room around 1. Pitocin was administered first, around 2 p.m. and I didn't really feel anything even though the machine was tracking some contractions. The resident checked my cervix and I was at 3 cm. Dr Chen's colleague Dr. Beyer came in around 3:30 and broke my bag. Another couple hours passed and I still didn't even feel like I was in labor, complaining to Peyton (my doula) and my husband that the waiting was causing me to feel anxious and just couldn't wait to feel pain. Finally around 5:30 or so I was on the phone with my sister and had a contraction that felt like a contraction. I labored leaning over the raised hospital bed, with Peyton rubbing my back through moderate contractions for about an hour and a half. At one point I actually said that I was "at peace during my contractions" because it felt good to finally FEEL something. During one of the contractions the nurse was trying to explain to Eddie how to turn music on the TV and she said "look for the channel with the daffodils." After this I kept having the word and image of daffodils in my head, imagining them blossoming open; this proved to be significant not only because it helped open up my cervix, but also when we got home there were flowers for us in our bedroom which E4 had picked out: daffodils.

Around 7 p.m. or so, my contractions started to become more intense; I knew this because I started swaying more and even moaned a bit. But I only had about 4 contractions like this before I exclaimed "rectal pressure!" and told Peyton I had to poop; I did poop. And then she asked the resident to check me because I was having the urge to push. The resident said "she's complete." And just like that a slurry of people were coming in the room; it was shift change time and all these nurses and doctors were introducing themselves amidst their own discussion of, what should we do? since the plan was for me to get an epidural; twin deliveries are required to get an epidural because of the risk of an emergency c-section for Baby B. Without it, you would have to be put under. Dr. Chen gave the orders over the phone to not give me the epidural and shortly thereafter they were wheeling me into the OR to begin pushing. The hardest part was wanting to push but them telling me not to because they weren't ready yet. Peyton was in my ear coaching me how to breathe through the contractions, as if holding in the breathes so as not to push. Only 1 person was allowed to accompany me into the OR and Eddie and I had discussed this at length prior; he unselfishly relinquished his spot to Peyton, knowing that she would be the most effective at supporting me through this potentially difficult labor. So, in the old school fashion, my husband was waiting outside the room, calling his family and friends, eagerly awaiting news. Back in the OR, I was uncomfortable lying down and began having really bad heartburn and then also complained that I was hungry. I pushed about 6 times and heard the joyous cries of baby A...a boy...my Clarkie. The pediatric team took him off to check vitals. I felt a huge sense of relief and did not feel at all like there was another baby in me, but they assured me that Baby B was there, head down and I could push during the next contraction. I pushed only three times and out came Will very smoothly and easily; I saw his screaming face and he looked just like E4 did at birth. Clark was 5 lbs 6 oz. and 18.5 inches long and received a 9.9 apgar score! Will was 5 lbs. 15 oz. and 19.25 inches long. Clark had a low glucose reading though and because they were technically pre-term at 36 weeks and 6 days (one more day and they would have been fullterm for twins!), Clark was admitted to the NICU that night. He had to have his blood sugar tested every 3 hours to make sure it was okay. And they had to feed him formula until it was brought up to the proper level. But once it was above a certain reading, I came and nursed him every three hours. He was discharged from the NICU the next day at 4 p.m. and we were all together as a family for only one night in the tiny hospital room until we left on Thursday at 3 p.m. E4 was home with Nonni and behaving well. When we arrived home with the babies he was a tad curious but mostly went about his business and played very independently. He was only interested in the babies when they would cry (typically during a diaper change) or when laying in their bassinet in the family room. He can say "Will" and Clark he calls "Baby C."

right now

2011-03-29T19:15:00.000-07:00

Right now amidst the punches and kicks of my unborn babies I am thinking of my other baby, my Eddie. I am always thinking about him, worrying about him. The speech pathologist's words echo in my mind: "we have to honor where he is at now." His whimsy, his fervor, his whirlwind of play and babble, his neediness, his introverted shyness and even his laziness and desire to stay in his PJs late into the afternoon. There is a wide spectrum of "typical childhood development," she tells me and Eddie falls arguably within that; he is just on the slower end of the spectrum. He is just a tad immature...in many ways. This insight was shared with me weeks ago and just recently as I was putting him to bed I tried to find a new perspective on this professional affirmation of my own assessment and intuition. I was thinking that our society is in too much of a rush. We expect our kids to grow up so fast, to mature too rapidly and to develop into independent mini adults way before their time. Maybe it is a good thing that Eddie is taking his time, maybe it is a good thing that he wants to be a baby a tad longer. Maybe he will grow into a confident, secure child and adult because he was allowed to indulge in infancy. I hope this. But my concern lingers. My husband has more faith - he says he looks into Eddie's eyes and sees that he is okay, that he is smart, that he is good. I wish I could feel this secure, instead of worrying over things like why he won't pedal his bike or why he runs and hides when people come to the door. I suppose this is all part of being a parent....deep breath....as I prepare to bring two more into the world.

the 3 hour nap

2011-03-14T13:36:00.001-07:00

Eddie has never been one for consistency when it comes to sleep, we all know this. Lately his naps are getting very inconsistent; some days he refuses a nap (it basically consists of a failure on my part to put him down effectively and so he will play in his crib for a half an hour/45 minutes or so but never sleep), most days his naps are more like 1 hour or maybe 2. But every once in awhile he simultaneously treats me and bewilders me with a 3 hour nap. Today is one of those days. He is just getting over a cold so I feel like it has been eons since he last took a good nap and I am trying to make the most out of this chunk of time but find myself getting consumed by phone calls and texts and emails and my ever-looming growling stomach that prevents me from ever getting any real solid project work done. But I did clean my oven yesterday, and I did pay to have my upholestry and rugs cleaned this morning, so I do feel somewhat productive. Pause. Take a bite of lasagna, lunch number two for me today.

32 weeks

2011-03-10T17:32:00.000-08:00

Baby A and B are 32 weeks now. Baby A is head down and Baby B is traverse, or lying horizontally across my abdomen. They are both curled up so tight it is hard to imagine that they will be able to get any bigger, and myself as well. I weigh 190 lbs. and am getting more and more immobile. They weigh 3 lbs. 14 oz and 3 lbs 15 ozs. We brought E4 with us to the doctor's appointment because he said he wanted to see the babies. He lasted about 8 minutes in the ultrasound room and then wanted to go back in the lobby to play. He is still sweet with me and occasionally will hug my belly and say "oh babies" but he is not as obsessed with them or the idea of them as he once was. These days he is in to the movie Cars and drinking smoothies. We have been making smoothies a couple times a day and he loves them and begs for more. Baby A and B like them too. :)

the big 3-0

2011-02-14T12:22:00.000-08:00

Eddie is 30 months today, that's officially 2 and a half. I cannot believe that in 6 months he will be three. I say this wholeheartedly because there are so many moments when he still seems like my little baby. He is my special special (this is a Thomas reference, which I also cannot believe I am stating). It is hard to measure your toddler's growth when you see him every day and his actions and words become predictable and commonplace; don't get me wrong, there are always a handful of things he does on a daily basis that amaze me, but in general it is hard to note development when it is unfolding before your very eyes.

Verbally he is making some progress, although I still feel like he has a long way to go to be comparable to his peers. He latest phrases are " Ba Da, See Me" which translates to "Bye Dad, See you later!," "Mama two babies" and he is really into the verb "do" and will say "Me/I do" or "Mama do." He says "I sit," "I eat," and "I stink" when he goes poop. He still talks about "Ho ho" a lot and will say "ho ho down chimney." I feel like we can have full conversations with him and he totally understands, and yet his expressive language lacks the ability to completely talk back to us. And yet he is so expressive in so many other ways, through his nonverbal gestures, nosies and facial experssions that there rarely seems to be an instance when we do not understand each other. His latest words are "boards," as in the hockey boards, "coal" as in what the tender of the train carries and "water." He is interested in how the snow melts into water. The speech therapist is very impressed with his play skills and thinks he is making good progress and so I guess I should not be as concerned as I am.

School is going well for him. He has struggled a tad more with the separation and there have been some days when just getting out the door has been a challenge, but yesterday I think we overcame a huge hurdle because I did not sneak out when I left him. I clearly made eye contact with him and told him "ok Eddie, I'm going to go. See you later." and he did not shed a tear or seem distraught at all. This is huge. They say that he is relatively shy and respects other kids' space; which means he does not like getting too close to others nor does he like it when another kid gets close or touches him. He likes gym class the best, but also seems to enjoy music and computer time. He made his first BM while at school yesterday, which is a good sign because it means he is comfortable there; Eddie typically never goes poop away from home. Can you believe that in 2.5 years I have yet to change a poopy diaper in a public setting?! I have never used one of those changing tables in a restroom. Ok, wait, clarification. We did have to change a poopy diaper at Old Orchard Beach in Maine...a poopy swim diaper...not fun.

Right now he is "in" to putting on his hockey equipment (thanks Uncle Will!) and parading around the house, putting on his "Bob" hard hat and pretending to fix things with his tool set, playing with his choo choos, puzzles (yes, he finally is getting into them and doing a very good job and juxtaposing the pieces into the right space), matching objects and finding hidden pictures ( he has always had a very astute eye for finding really small pictures of objects amidst others), counting (the only number he can say is "two" but he will point at items and make a counting noise). He enjoys reading and asking me "what's that" to every little detail on the page, even things like sky and doorknobs and bows in girls' hair.

He still loves to play outside. We took advantage of the 50 degree weather and sun today and he spent over an hour literally rolling around in the mud, shoveling the thawed out earth. We walked down our block and he picked up every stick he could find and threw them in the street. We are both excited for spring.

a true Chicagoan

2011-02-10T09:22:00.000-08:00

Eddie had his first taste of Chicago-style stuffed pizza last night. He loved it. I was shocked because so far he has been quite picky about the kind of pizza he will eat. He loved it so much that he asked for more as his late night snack before bed, AND he also asked for it for breakfast! He cannot say the word "pizza" yet but he basically demanded it this morning by opening the fridge and pointing to the box and then throwing a temper tantrum when I told him he couldn't have pizza for breakfast. Alas, I gave in. Pizza for breakfast it was!

more cars or barbie shoes?

2011-02-05T13:05:00.000-08:00

The other day I stepped on a toy car that Eddie had left on the bathroom floor, and I couldn't help but think what my future holds: more cars or barbie shoes scattered across our floors? I have been convinced that we are having twin boys, and every reliable indication seems to point in that direction too. My acupuncturist has a pretty good track record for predicting the sex of babies and she has said "Boys" the last two times I have gone. But I still feel so awful, and there is scientific evidence proving that girls cause you feel worse because of the hormones, so the past few days I have been thinking that maybe Baby A and Baby B don't have penises after all.

At 26 weeks now, about 6 months, I cannot believe that I have three months to go. My goal is to carry these babies as long as possible, but recently I have started to feel so off that I cannot imagine carrying them for a full term. Sleep has become a challenge. My constipation has turned into loose stools, multiple times a day, I have intense pelvic pressure at times, lower back ache that radiates down my thighs in a dull ache and it is getting difficult to maneuver and do simple things like pick something up off the floor or put my socks on. I had to reschedule my last doctor's appointment because of the blizzard, but I go on Monday and I am for sure going to mention all of these "off" feelings because they are all associated with pre-labor signs; well everything except the annoyance of putting on socks. My heartburn is in full force and unfortunately I am still throwing up every once in awhile, which does not feel good at all because the gut contracts and then puts even more pressure on my cervix. I have accepted the fact that I will not ever feel good during this pregnancy; no spurts of energy to get house projects done in the classic nesting fashion that most pregnancies allow. It is hard enough just picking up toys, washing dishes and cooking dinner. Gone are my goals of cleaning the oven, reorganizing closets and "spring cleaning." I guess I will just have to focus on accomplishing the bare minimum...maybe I can get the old baby toys washed and all the bassinets, bouncy seats and car seats in decent form...

the sickies

2011-01-20T08:54:00.001-08:00

Just cannot win with this pregnancy and health. At 18 weeks I caught a nasty stomach flu bug and now at 25 weeks I am battling a terrible head cold. Seems like I caught it from E4 as he came down with it on Sunday and I woke up Tuesday with congestion. We are both coughing and blowing snot out of our noses. This is day three of not leaving the house. Ugh.

school days

2011-01-13T11:13:00.000-08:00

It has been a monumental, busy week for E4. He started baseball on Monday and then "school" on Tuesday! He was very tentative at baseball, and would have preferred to just watch the three year olds bat or run around exploring the huge fieldhouse, but he did a fairly decent job at moving from drill to drill and following the coach's directions with assistance from Mom. On Tuesday he went to his school, Creme de la Creme, from 8:30 - 11:30; today, Thursday, I picked him up at noon. He will go there 2 days a week from 8:30 - 12:30. It is a day care/pre-school that operates on an intense, rotational curriculum. This means that he changes classrooms and activities every half hour. For the next few months his schedule is as follows:
8:30 -9 Creative Movement (everything from parachute to yoga to dance; they wrote on his summary sheet "Eddie is really good at throwing a ball and catching.")
9 - 9:30 Computer Lab (today they worked on the letter "o" and they said he repeated the word "ox!")
9:30 - 10 Snack and Free Play
10- 10:30 Outside Playground
10:30 -11 Music/Drama (today they wrote "Eddie enjoyed playing with musical instruments.")
11- 11:30 Gym
11:30 - 12 Lunch/Math Concepts (they were impressed that he ate all of his cucumber and tomato salad and asked for more!)

His teachers are Ms. Jamie and Ms. Courtney, young and energetic women, plus he sees special instructors for classes like Creative Movement and Music. There is a tremendous amount of staff there. Every day I get a written report of what he learned/did, ate and if he had a diaper change or tried to use the potty. Today they also wrote on the sheet "Eddie is a great helper!"

On his first day I stayed in his first class for about 15 minutes and then snuck out and he didn't even notice. Today I tried to do the same and he saw me leaving and ran over to the door and started to cry, so I stayed for another 5 minutes and then snuck out and he did fine. The teachers said he has been doing really well. Today when I went to pick him up he ran over to me right away but then he didn't want to leave. He showed me the bathroom and how he washed his hands, then he proceeded to climb on the cots they were getting ready for the other kids' naps and even laid down on one for a bit and then I told him I was going to leave but he could stay if he wanted, and of course he joined me at the door. He likes drinking from the water fountain/bubbler. And he loves the pond in the lobby with all the fish; has to say goodbye to the fish every day. Then as we leave we pass the TV monitors in the lobby (this is a cool feature for parents to observe their children) and he points out all the rooms with the "babies." As we drove home today, he fell asleep. Busy days for my growing boy!

As for me, the separation has been way easier than most, including myself, would have anticipated. I find myself driving away smiling, knowing that he is adjusting well and seems excited to go there each morning. The time goes quickly and I find I cannot get all the things done I would have hoped. Today I went home and got to take a long shower and meet a friend for coffee. It is a nice break, but in general, I prefer being a full-time mom and it makes me feel like a fish out of water to be with out him and have time to myself. I feel like he is in good hands, although I do worry about illnesses on the horizon; I swear every kid in there either has a cough or some secretions coming from nose or eyes. There are about 10 or so kids in his class, although the number seems to vary since some kids are there all week and of course there are always kids out sick. A little girl named Cora seems to like him...let's hope she doesn't have the cooties.

Baby A and Baby B: 24 weeks

2011-01-11T12:02:00.000-08:00

Things are just happening too fast now...there doesn't seem to be time to blog about everything going on in our lives and I know it is only going to get crazier. I will try to blog about both E4 and the babies, mostly as separate posts. A friend of mine asked if I was keeping a journal throughout my pregnancy like I did for Eddie, and I felt bad because the answer is of course, no.

So, here is a start: the babies are 24 weeks now and weigh 1 lb. 6 oz and 1 lb. 8 oz, for Baby A and Baby B respectively. I was very excited by this news yesterday because it is quite common for monozygotic twins (identical) to vary in size and if the discordance is drastic enough then they might induce labor prematurely; up until this point Baby B has been remarkably larger and so to see that Baby A is catching up is a good sign. Baby A is by far more active; I feel movement on the right side of my womb throughout the day, all day. But during yesterday's ultrasound Baby B's feet were actually on the right side of my body, so maybe I have been mistaking Baby A's movement for Baby B's kicks! Baby A is head down...let's hope she/he stays that way and I can attempt a vaginal birth...the reality of a c-section is starting to sink in as I mentally prepare for a very different labor experience than I had with Eddie. This is ultimately what led me to selfishly decide that we were not going to find out the sex of the twins; if I end up having a scheduled c-section and we knew what we were having, then it would feel like just a surgery to me. But by not knowing, then no matter what, it will feel like a birth. I am still not feeling great. I still have a strong gag reflex and will dry heave in the morning or really any time that I get hungry and do not eat. Still eating for four (yes, E4 is still nursing, but thankfully weaning). And our Whole Foods bills are reflecting this surge in appetite. The worst part about the throwing up/dry heaving is that it also makes me pee simultaneously, which means having to change my clothes. (I had to add this gross detail because I know some day I will laugh at it!) The heartburn isn't as bad as it was with Eddie, but it is there. The other differences in this pregnancy are the extreme hunger (of course), constipation and more of a sexual interest. There are things I am eating this time around that I couldn't go near last time and vice versa: this pregnancy I am eating a ton of red meat (last time abhorred it); cannot eat or see chicken; nuts and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are in this time around and last time I avoided them; and I don't seem to have a problem with mayonnaise this time around either. Had to buy a new winter coat today because I was getting sick of stuffing myself into my other one. Also made my doctor's appointment for my 32 week visit (march 7), which sounds oh so close in terms of potential delivery and also the date itself...scary. We are not ready yet, you hear that Baby A and Baby B? Stay in there as long as possible!

hockey on the pond

2010-12-26T19:13:00.000-08:00

Check out this video of Eddie and his Dad playing hockey on the pond behind my parents' house. This was undoubtedly the highlight of our Christmas. It almost brought tears to my eyes to watch them every morning as they rode down the hill in the sled with Dad's skates and then laced up and hit the ice. E4 loved being on the ice and also sledding...and of course the hot cocoa that awaited them when they came inside.

ho ho

2010-12-10T13:40:00.000-08:00

This is Eddie's new phrase of the moment: "ho ho." He says it anytime he sees something related to Christmas, as in Santa, a tree or any holiday decor really. He is obsessed with the holiday specials, especially Shrek the Halls and Prep and Landing. We have already watched Prep and Landing 4 times today. He just keeps saying "more, more."

first haircut

2010-12-07T19:06:00.000-08:00

I cut a few locks from Eddie's hair tonight while in the tub. Crazy that at 27 months he still does not need a proper haircut. But it was time to cut off some of the overgrown whispy ends that were getting too long in the back, specifically right by the ears. After the third little snip he grabbed his head and said "No!" He likes his hockey hair the way it is.

our thanksgiving weekend

2010-11-29T13:34:00.000-08:00

The long holiday weekend in Wisconsin felt extra long for a still nauseous prego me, but E4 seemed to really enjoy himself from Thanksgiving at the Wennings and playing with all of cousin Sophie's toys, swimming in the hotel pool, wrestling with his cousin Noah and getting his first real hockey stick. Here are some photos:

The kids and their kids

Eddie and Noah playing "bumper" strollers

Mom and Dad (and Baby A and Baby B!)

Playing outside

The cutting down of his first real hockey stick (which I am told is akin to circumcision; a.k.a. a big deal)

Playing street hockey

new obsession

2010-11-21T16:15:00.000-08:00

Eddie is obsessed with babies these days, pointing out babies he sees everywhere and constantly pointing to mom's belly and saying "baby." After he saw my ultrasound images, he made this drawing which he proudly points to and says "baby," "baby" and "mom."

pre-school

2010-11-18T11:53:00.000-08:00

I don't know what it is like in other cities, but in Chicago the pre-school application process is akin to college admissions. Some parents even begin the process with baby still in utero. The tours start in the Fall and decisions are made in the following February/March. I have a headache just thinking about it all, after my third school tour and open house this morning. In 2011 Eddie will turn 3 right before the cut off; children who turn 3 by September 1 are eligible for pre-school. Which means he will be one of the youngest ones. And I worry that he will not be ready, especially as a boy, and as a boy who is speech delayed (note, we start speech therapy the week after Thanksgiving). But I want him in some sort of school setting, partially for me because I will be at home with twins and also for him, socially. We have actually made the costly decision to start him in a 2 year old "school" program that is two days a week, starting in January...so maybe he will be well adjusted, potty-trained and all by the time he is three. Anyway, back to the pre-school application process. Our neighborhood school, a Chicago Public School called Audubon, is very good; considered one of the top 10 CPS elementary schools in the city. And we are on the list there; preference is given to siblings of current attending families, then to 4 year olds and then to neighborhood. So it would be ideal if we got one of the 24 spots. But we are also strongly considering moving; our house is just too small for 3 little ones. And so then that option may go out the window. So I have toured 2 of the Catholic schools in the neighborhood and considering touring one more, which is not so close to us or remotely close to where we will probably move, but it is our parish and where Eddie got baptised, so we will have some advantage to getting in there. Today I toured a private school that is known for its strong community involvement and small class size; I was exposed to it when I was working with Organic School Project and they asked us to help them with their lunch program. I thought it was a good school that was under the radar...but as I walked into a room filled with big diamonds and suits, numbering probably close to 100, I realized that this school is definitely on people's radar and it will be highly competitive to get into the newly opening pre-school with 14 spots for 4 year olds and 14 spots for 3 year olds. I talked with several parents and most have applied to at least 10 other schools. Yikes!

I want to find the ideal environment for Eddie; a school that has good outdoor space and daily recess for longer than 10 minutes, and attentive, caring teachers with the ability to service his needs, assuming that because of his language delay he will be classified as special needs. I like the schools that address readiness and skills through an inclusive process, meaning that if kids are slow readers they are not pulled out of the classroom or signaled out in an overt way, but that they are helped sufficiently within the classroom and are able to participate in regular classtime with their peers. Surprisingly, many of the schools do this now and provide a very individualized education, catered to that child's skill level. I find myself getting wrapped up in the process, asking tons of questions and intently observing the students and teachers to get a feel for the school. I guess this happens for anyone who valued their education as much as I did. Crazy though that Eddie is only two, still in diapers and only saying about 20 or so words, and here I am imagining him as an eighth grader with a locker and a cell phone. Am I ready for this?

my babies

2010-10-22T11:06:00.000-07:00

I think I am destined to have two more boys (Sorry Grandmas). We won't officially find out the sex until December 20, but right now my gut is telling me that there are a couple of dudes in there. Literally, my stomach is in overdrive and I am constantly hungry and feeling like I am feeding a small army. Last night I awoke at 3 a.m. starved and consumed a bagel with cream cheese, 3 slices of pizza, a piece of pumpkin pie and some Terra chips; it was not all in one sitting but between the hours of 3 and 5. The unfortunate part about it was that after eating one thing I would return to bed, thinking my stomach was full enough, but then was unable to fall sleep because of the continual churning, indicating that I had to eat more. I woke up at 7 a.m. starved yet again. Despite attempting to consume as many calories as possible, a couple hours ago, after eating string cheese, I threw up. Note to self: chew your cheese better. That one hurt. Man. The funny thing was that for the first time, Eddie walked in on me throwing up. He didn't seem wierded out by it at all. He just repeatedly flushed the toilet and then lifted the lid, as if to check that everything went away. I have to admit that he has been a trooper throughout this ugly first stage of pregnancy. Many mornings I just lie on the couch and he plays around me, totally entertaining himself. He seems to understand.

I know this blog is supposed to be about everything Eddie, and of course, here I am writing about myself and the next arrival. So this brings to surface a question I am asking myself, what to do about the blog? I doubt I will have much time to blog about twins, but I want to give them their own records. It is only fair. I say this as the second born with an empty baby book and lack of any records indicating my early development other than my mother's memory, which thankfully is rather astute. Since the URL is "babywashuk" maybe I should just convert the blog to be about all of our babies? Thoughts?

ER

2010-10-04T15:59:00.000-07:00

We made our first trip to the Children's' Memorial Hospital Emergency Room on Friday night. Eddie came down with a cold on Wednesday and on Friday morning it had settled into his chest and he was wheezing. Now this has happened in the past when he gets a cold, but it usually doesn't seem to bother him too much and it goes away in a day. But on Friday he was not himself, almost lifeless. By the afternoon he could hardly walk and would collapse to the floor and just lie there attempting to play. When Eddie got home from work we went to the ER, at the urging of our pediatrician. Because of his severe oxygen obstruction (triage classified it as a "code red" which is the most serious!) he had to receive three breathing treatments and a dose of the oral steroid Prednisone. The breathing treatments entailed pinning him down and placing a mask on his face so that he could inhale the albutural for up to 10 minutes. He screamed and thrashed the whole ten minutes and all three times. It was the hardest thing we have ever been through with him. At one moment during the second treatment I teared up, remembering the days of colic and holding him as he screamed in pain and feeling so helpless. This was a close second to that agony; the difference was that after the 10 minutes of hell, he would light up and was all playful and talkative. The drugs do make him a tad hyper, which is an expected side effect. We were there from 6 p.m. - 11 p.m. and all in all, it was not too bad. Eddie did very well just sitting there between the treatments, reading books and playing with his choo-choos. it was almost reminiscent of being on an airplane, as we of course did not want him walking around and exploring. He is still taking an inhaler version of the albutural and the oral steroid, which I am a tad skeptical about, being a naturalist. But breathing is the most important. Hopefully this is just something that we will have to monitor when he gets colds and it won't develop into full-blown asthma...I don't think I could handle regular episodes of pinning him down to administer doses of medicine. I feel like he was sort of traumatized by it too because he did not sleep well at all the two nights afterward; he woke up five times on Saturday night and was all out of sorts, even still screaming after I picked him up and sat in the chair with him. Poor guy :(

Reflections of Motherhood

2010-09-30T15:08:00.000-07:00

This was shared by a Mom group I am in...thought I would share it with my blog readers. My card would read "Surrender." But I also like the ones that say: "Imperfect is the new perfect," "You are the Expert" and "Millions of parents have survived sleep deprivation."

seasons

2010-09-27T10:49:00.000-07:00

Summer is officially over. The under-ripened tomatoes still hang on the vine and shiver with every gust of cool Autumn air. The jackets have been brought out and the swimsuits and shorts are put away. We tried on a couple of hats yesterday and realized that Eddie's head has undoubtedly grown and it is time to make some seasonal purchases. I finally posted some summer photos in the side panel/slideshow panel of the blog, and I feel sort of sad as they whisk by; fleeting moments of our last summer as just the three of us (well, and Marty, of course makes four). This is perhaps the most sadness I feel when I think about the arrival of two more...that our special little family is going to change so dramatically and that the life that Eddie is so comfortable with is going to be forever altered. Despite how tired and nauseous I feel now, my goal is to really savor these next six months with my little boy...to savor this Fall and Winter like never before: carve pumpkins, pick apples, bake cookies, build snowmen, throw snowballs, chase bunnies that live under our deck and just surrender to his every wild, boyish desire. Because come Spring, more than just the seasons will change.

big brother

2010-09-24T11:42:00.001-07:00

I knew there was a reason I was waiting to write this post. Well, we went to the doctor today and confirmed that yes, we are pregnant and yes, Eddie is going to be a big brother. But as the screen on the ultrasound lit up my uterus we saw something totally unexpected: two fetuses....yes, we are having twins! Identical twins. The odds are .2%, according to my doctor. Crazy, just pure crazy. The due date is May 4, but odds are likely that they will arrive much much earlier than that. We are still in shock and so many thoughts and emotions are rushing through me - excitement, fear and a bit of sadness because this will be a major adjustment for our little Bomby. We have started talking about how there is a baby in Mommy's belly...but now to explain that there are two? I look for guidance, for support, for suggestions because I feel like I am entering a whole new territory when it comes to birth and parenting. Twins.

a femivore finding her tribe

2010-09-01T11:18:00.001-07:00

I came across a term recently that seemed to fit me to a tee: femivore - a highly educated woman who chooses to stay home and raise the kids, along with a vegetable garden and often chickens. It's the newest form of feminism which aims to take control of one's carbon footprint while providing a healthy, sustainable lifestyle for your family. In Chicago, despite a popular green farmers market and rampant support for bicyclists, I tend to find myself a tad alone when it comes to my natural mothering lifestyle choices, most notably the fact that I still nurse my two year old and go to him throughout the night. I have always felt comfortable amongst our social circles and family, and never felt as though I had to defend my parenting style; well, until recently when a visit from a college friend turned into a full-blown discussion on attachment parenting, the life of stay-at-home mom (which she seemed to view as depressing and I find liberating) and my own manifesto in defense of nursing a toddler. And so I have joined two new mom support groups, La Leche League and Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS). Both are international organizations, the former with an emphasis on breastfeeding support and the latter with a more broad focus on parenting. I also like both groups for the fact that the meetings are in the morning and kids are welcome, allowing Eddie good opportunities to play with other kids. Actually, at one point I would have said that I was joining these groups for him...to broader our social circles..."our" meaning my son and I, and ultimately meaning that I am still searching for consistent playmates for my budding socialite. But now after attending this first session of La Leche today, I am starting to realize that these groups are genuinely for me, for me to "find my tribe," a term that is thrown around amongst these groups that means to find a supportive community of women (based on Jean Liedloff's book "The Continuum Concept" and expanded by Teresa Pitman in the article here ).

This La Leche meeting was a hoot - unique, I think, and special in so many ways and filled with the intensity that only breastfed children seem to exempt regardless of age as they explore their world with passion and then run to mommy for comfort. My Eddie fit right in, and actually was a sort of a trouble-maker/ring-leader with the toys. At one point he was banging together two plastic bowling pins, then swinging one like a bat and shortly thereafter I saw three other kids mimicking him. But the real scene was all the breastfeeding amongst women trying to having a serious conversation (about weaning of all things!) while watching and gently disciplining their children. Jealous of the mothers' of newborns were we who found ourselves on the floor to stop our kids from fighting over toys. At various moments throughout the hour long session I observed the leader of the group with both children attached to her bosoms - one had to be 3 and the other was 1 1/2. The three year old stood up while sucking away at her mom, while the younger boy squirmed to and fro on the other nipple. Wow. This was tandem nursing in full force. All the while their mother remained calm and collected as she moderated a discussion. It was obvious by the discussion and by what I was witnessing (and partaking in, as Eddie had to have him "num nums" too!), that no one here had any genuine experience with weaning. Oh well.

I left feeling exhausted, but empowered. I reconnected with a friend of a friend. I borrowed two books, one entitled "How Weaning Happens." And as we made our way outside and Eddie ran off for the nearest mud puddle, I was invited to join another group, a nature group, that schedules play dates in neat outdoor places, and to attend a "chickenpox party," hailed as the natural way to give your kid the chicken pox so they don't have to get the vaccine. Hmmm. I just may have found my tribe.

hand holding

2010-08-29T10:44:00.000-07:00

Six months ago I never thought I would be able to write this, but Eddie is a total hand holder now. He used to want to go everywhere independently and would take off in ferocious intesity to explore new territory. Now, he is more reluctant, even more tentative and really likes to hold our hands. The other day we walked over to a friend's house and he held my hand the whole way. He will actually stop before we cross the street and reach up for my hand. I love it.

birthday bash

2010-08-26T11:03:00.000-07:00

We are still in recovery mode from Eddie's 2nd birthday held on Saturday. 17 kids ranging in ages from 5 months to 8 years old, and 20-some adults were here to celebrate with our guy. I spent most of the time in the kitchen, as usual, so I didn't get to witness all the craziness, but I heard that Eddie was profusely drinking water out of his new water table, fighting over various balls and trying to steal other kids' juice boxes. Nice. At one point he was in the house and had a full-on breakdown because he wanted his friend Gabriel's toy motorcycle. I pulled him away and took him into the living room where his presents where stacked, and said, Eddie, look, all these gifts are for you. And he replied with an "oooh." It is one of his new sort of words, and he was "oooh"ing and "wow"ing all day and over the course of the next four days as we opened all the gifts slowly. He definitely had fun playing with the mix of neighborhood friends and friends of mom and dad; of course cousin Noah was present and in full playing force too. But he did seem overwhelmed. At one point he was just sitting on his Uncle Mike's lap, watching. When it came to cake time he didn't have much interest in blowing out the candle or really even eating the cake, as he was taken with mom's homemade cookies. The day ended with our annual balloon release. And alas, two mornings later Eddie woke up with the sniffles and now has a cold. Too much partying, I guess!

two

2010-08-18T12:32:00.000-07:00

It's 2:34 as I start to type. Two years ago at this time I was climbing out of the supersized, 98 degree whirlpool tub in the hospital room at Prentice and getting into the bed to push...an exciting yet awkward feeling that was accompanied with some nausea, anxiety and simultaneous gratitude for all the amazing support I had in the room. Today I still have some of those emotions when I reflect upon the last year of E4's life. Nausea I suppose the least, but sort of appropriate because we are still battling with sleep deprivation from our continued night waking...but it has gotten way better in the last two weeks. Ever since our travels have ceased and our routines are back on track, Eddie has been either sleeping through the night or only waking up once. Praise the Lord. Another huge sleep achievement, in my opinion, is that he is finally waking up and not crying or whining, but rather now when he wakes up he will start to talk and play...this is music to my ears.

Anxiety is still an emotion I naturally feel as a mother because there is always something to be concerned about when it comes to your child/ren. Although I am the most stable and at ease right now in my life than ever before...and I attribute most of that to my happy son (and of course his loving father), there is still much I worry about regarding Eddie's development, namely his verbal skills. Although he has progressed, he is probably more akin with an 18 month old's level of speech. Words like "shoe," "baby," "hot," and "stuck" are now part of his vocabulary, and he makes noises for some words like "ooo-ooo-ooo" for a monkey (namely Curious George) and "choo-choo" for a train, but he does not pronounce many consonants so words like "ball" are still absent of any "ll"s and much of his talk is unrecognizable babble. Many kids his age are now talking in simple sentences and combining nouns, adjectives and verbs. So I inevitably feel like he is behind...and that he will forever be my baby. He still seems like a baby to me in so many ways - he still nurses a ton, he still sleeps in a crib and he still wears diapers. These are things that I know some kids have grown out of already before the age of two, so I just feel like we have a long way to go yet and that this next year is going to be a busy one!

Eddie has made huge strides this year in his gross motor and athletic skills, and I guess these are the traits that most people recognize in him to be advanced. He can swing a real golf club, he can swing a bat and hit a ball consistently off a tee, he can kick and dribble a soccer ball, he can shoot hoops, both slam dunk and jump shot and he throws a mean, lefty, fast ball, complete with a leg pump. These are things that my husband is extremely proud of, of course. We have a genuine athlete on our hands. Other than sports, Eddie is also "in"to playing with cars and trucks, playing with and pointing out all trains, riding his bike (although he hasn't gotten the hang of pedaling quite yet), watching Sesame Street, particularly Elmo, going for walks in the neighborhood (which rarely consists of a stroller these days since he just wants to walk and run freely) and playing with other kids. You should see the excited look on his face when he runs out to the front of our house and hears or sees other kids playing in the neighborhood. Some of the most pure joy I have witnessed in him has been during moments of playing with his friends and cousins. He still loves to eat and has mastered eating with a spoon and a fork and sits at our table on a grown-up chair. He is quite well mannered. He wipes his mouth with a napkin when complete. His favorite foods at this point seem to be corn, blueberries, peaches, salmon, anything growing in our garden and any meat off the bone - he loves lamb chops and chicken legs. He is genuinely a decisive, seasonal eater with a discerning palate (yes, I am so proud!). For example, although normally he loves corn on the cobb (he even eats it raw as we shuck it), one time we had a bad batch from the store and he would not finish his. It was too funny. He hardly eats tomatoes in the winter; now that they are in-season, he pops them in his mouth like candy.

Gratitude. I am grateful for my husband, most of all. He is my rock, my sounding board and dedicated life partner. He always makes me feel like I am the best mother and wife in the world, and this is important, especially when you are a stay-home mom with nothing else to shift your focus to. I am grateful for my Bomby, my Totty, my Cuddlebug. Happy is the way we start every morning and end every day. He is an experienced, seasoned soul, someone who has walked this Earth before and proceeds with slight caution and decisive,captivated focus. His intensity burns from the inside out. His humor is like a seed still germinating. He will bring joy to so many. He will work hard and with great focus. I am certain that amazing things are yet to come from my son.

more images

2010-08-13T12:08:00.000-07:00

summertime

2010-08-13T11:42:00.000-07:00

Summertime means spending more time outdoors...hence no blogging. We have been busy with trips, first to LA, then to Maine and most recently to Appleton and Milwaukee, WI. We have swam in oceans, lakes and pools. We have devoured corn on the cob, steamer clams, lobster and fruit galore. We have gone for boat rides, rode a jet ski and took a ferry. We have danced at weddings, played with old friends and reunited with family and extended family. We have been to Old Orchard Beach where we rode a carousel, the Milwaukee Zoo where we saw hippos and elephants and giraffe, and the State Fair where we went down the big slide and ate a cream puff. Ahhh, too much fun and not enough time to capture it all in writing. Here are some highlights:

on having two under two

2010-07-19T06:01:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we willingly took on the pleasurable task of babysitting my nephew Noah while my sister and her husband wine-d in Napa and attended a wedding. The first two days were great because Noah slept through the night, and it was nice for Eddie to have a constant playmate. The TV never had to be turned on. They were too busy chasing each other through the house, pounding on the door to go outside and simply put, eating and pooping. There was one day where I swear they were tandem pooping; Noah had 4, Eddie 2. I felt like I was constantly either feeding them or changing diapers. And thank god for having a dog to help clean up all the meal messes. Noah is truly a messy eater; I never realized how good of an eater, both in terms of what is consumed and how it is consumed, Eddie was/is until I spent 4 full days with Noah. By day three, we were all a bit exhausted though. Noah had a rough night of sleep due to some arriving molars, and he became very clingy on me; he would only be held or changed or put to be by me. And that seemed to make little Eddie need me even more too. At one moment between the two boys and my needy dog Mara, I felt like I needed to have two more arms as my husband stood back laughing at the spectacle on the couch of Eddie nursing, Noah being fed a bottle and Mara cuddled up next to us. It feels good to be needed so much...but having two kids, especially two boys, under the age of two is not something I would wish upon anyone. It is seriously draining, and the only thing that gets you through it are those precious moments of child independence and tandem giggling during play.

sprinkler fun

2010-07-16T13:14:00.000-07:00

Check out this footage of my guys from last weekend while we watched Noah:

LA man

2010-07-06T19:37:00.000-07:00

We traveled to Los Angeles over the weekend to attend Uncle Charlie Washuk's wedding to Catherine Kucher and to baptize their 3 1/2 month old son Alex. Leading up to the trip Eddie came down with a wicked cold - started with the eye drainage on Father's Day which was diagnosed as official "pink eye" and had to take drops, and then progressed into major congestion, snot and cough. So needless to say, I was a bit worried about our travels. But Eddie did so awesome. It is evident that he is way more adaptable and more go-with-the-flow than his mother. On both flights he slept for an hour and a half, sat well in our laps, reading books and playing with cars, ate snacks, played with the headphone and only once did he request to walk up and down the aisle. We didn't even have to bust out the laptop and the Cars DVD. When we arrived at the hotel room I was immediately uneasy about its lack of a tub (only shower) since our nightly bath routine would have to be modified, and the "crib" I had ordered was really just a pack n' play. I think I said three times, "I should have just brought our own," worried that he would not sleep well in the hard, foreign beddy. But he did fine. I was also stressed about the scheduling of all the activities and how it would coordinate with his sleep schedule. But he proved that he can fall asleep in the car for a nap and still function as a delightful, entertaining little guy. We had a busy, fun-filled weekend of wedding activities, Alex's baptism and BBQ, then a trip to a pool party in the Hills. Eddie was lovin' the LA weather (cool 70's and sun every day) and the laid back lifestyle. Thanks for Katie and Charlie for carting us around all weekend and for all the fun! All the photos are posted on my Facebook page.

thank god for involved dads

2010-06-21T06:08:00.000-07:00

Well, there haven't been many blog posts lately because everyone, except our rock solid, charged immune-system Dad, is under the weather. I suppose this is my delayed Father's day post, delayed because I have been sick. I had septoplasty surgery to correct my nose's deviated septum last Friday and my recovery has taken longer than expected, mostly due to inadequate sleep and then because two days ago I came down with some viral cold/flu. Eddie hasn't been sleeping well either lately and on Saturday evening we discovered why - he was coming down with something too. He had 100 degree fever and this heavy eye drainage that leaves the eye lashes crusty and causes yellow boogers in the corner of the eyes. He is doing much better today. Even Marty doesn't seem well and has had diarrhea a couple of times. So with everyone under the weather we all need a little support, and I am so lucky to have that kind of support from my husband. One morning while I was still recovering from my surgery, he made breakfast of eggs and bacon, and I must admit that his was as good as mine! He has been helping out tremendously with childcare, playing with Eddie and taking him out of house so I can get some rest. My own father was not around much during the week when we were kids - he just worked so many hours. I don't know how my Mom did it...I think about this every day around 4 p.m. when my husband walks through the door and relives me, reviving both Eddie and I. My Mom was lucky if my Dad was home before we went to bed. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have help five days out of the week. Yesterday I was feeling so awful and lamenting at how dirty the house was and how I was too ill to make dinner and my husband said , "forget about it. we are going to order out for dinner, put Eddie to bed and then relax and go to bed early." This was so perfect and exactly what I needed to hear. So I am thankful for involved Dads...thank you to all the Dads who change the diapers, prepare the baths, serve the snacks and most importantly, play with their kids. Nothing makes a Mom smile more than watching her husband play and laugh with her baby.

accident prone

2010-06-06T07:24:00.000-07:00

For the sake of record keeping, I have to report on Eddie's recent accidents. A month ago he fell and cut his bottom lip pretty bad, although the bleeding stopped quickly and he hardly cried. His Dad was out of town and so I sought the second opinion of my neighbors, whom all concluded that he was fine and it should heal on its own with no need for stitches. It did and they were right. This week he fell at the park and escaped with no cuts or scrapes but has been limping, especially when barefoot, for six days now. He can put pressure on both legs, can walk and run and is showing no signs of any pain, no swelling, no bruising. And most people who see him move think that it hardly warrants a trip to the doctor, but as the mother, I am still concerned. His gait is definitely affected even though his confidence and activity level isn't. Last night while eating dinner he fell off the chair. He was throwing his food (which I hope is not a new habit) and propelled himself off the chair. The wind seemed knocked out of him, but other than that, no injuries.

body b

2010-05-27T13:14:00.000-07:00

Check out Eddie's bicep muscle as he dives into his pool!

("body b" is something his dad says...it means body beautiful...probably from a movie or something)

kodak moments

2010-05-25T09:15:00.000-07:00

Our camera has been in the shop for over 4 weeks now and I am missing it. It fell off the couch and the lens popped off and wouldn't go back on. There have been some special moments over these past weeks that I wish I was able to capture; luckily, our handheld digital still works, but it is not the same as our Nikon SLR. There was the afternoon we played outside with the neighborhood kids and the older boys took Eddie for a high speed wagon ride. He was in seventh heaven. There was Eddie's first romp through the sprinkler, which he loved, and the first dip in the pool (yesterday). There have been many special moments between Eddie and his cousin Noah lately. The other night they were both "playin in the kitchen," as I call it (from one of our music class songs). They were banging pots and pans and hitting the wall with measuring spoons. Oh, there are so many moments that you just cannot capture on film. Like when Noah pointed at Eddie and then Eddie responded by touching Noah's finger, ala ET. And when Eddie was outside on the deck and Noah was inside and they were pressed against the screen giving each other kisses. The camera also wasn't there when we picked our first ripe strawberry from the garden and ate it together, Eddie stuffing the remainder of it in his mouth, along with its leafy top. Nor did I have it on hand when we baked chocolate chip cookies together and Eddie really dove into the flour, proudly covering himself with white dust. Sometimes you just cannot grab the camera quick enough and the moment is lost, except in your memory...perhaps these are the true kodak moments.

how boys play

2010-05-23T18:41:00.001-07:00

A recent trip to Family Grounds, a drop-in play space by our house, reminded me of how different boys and girls truly are. Six boys (including my Eddie), ages ranging from 18 months to 3 1/2, huddled around a train table in silence. Well except for the occassional vroom or hum or choo-choo. These boys played with the trains, hardly interacting with each other, other than the occasional shove or snatching of another's train. The girls, there were few that day, were parading around in feather boas and chatting about their babies. Wow. The gender roles are so engrained at such a young age. And the verbalization of the sexes differs so much too. Again yesterday I marveled as my Eddie played alongside of his neighborhood friends - three other boys ages 3, 5 and 7, and they built train tracks on the sidewalk in silence. For a whole hour. Intensity was there though.

mama's day

2010-05-09T19:15:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms reading this! My second Mother's Day has come and gone, and this year I am feeling a bit more emotional. Maybe it's because being a Mom is hard work, filled with sleepless nights and constant testing of patience. Maybe it's because my guy got a 100.7 degree fever half way through the day. Maybe it's because the day just didn't go as I had imagined in my head...but they really never do once you have kids, do they? A friend of mine says that her motto is "adjust we must," and she announces this every time things run amuck and plans must get shifted. This is so true. Being agile and making adjustments is a major part of being a Mom. So when your 20 month old suddenly seems unsocial and sleepy, you put him down for a nap, even though company is over and you are in the midst of flipping pancakes. And when he still seems sleepy later in the day, you put him down for another nap even though he hasn't taken two naps for months and you were planning on visiting friends. Last year on Mother's Day I was sick. This year my Bomby is sick, and clings to me, reaches for me saying "mama, mama."

zoo, ice cream

2010-05-07T19:12:00.000-07:00

Eddie had a busy week, despite still recovering from cold number six of the season (hopefully the last). It was such a beautiful week of spring weather that on Tuesday we went to the Lincoln Park Zoo, finally. We became members for the year, which means free parking passes, which is a huge incentive. We arrived early, shortly after 9 a.m. and it was perfect because it wasn't crowded at all except for several other babies and toddlers in strollers. Eddie seemed to like the tiger and other felines the best. His new word is "see" and he says it as he points to things. He was saying "see!" a lot as he noticed all the animals. He didn't seem freaked out at all, which for some reason I thought he would be. I also thought he would be really into the gorillas and various monkeys, but he wasn't. He was more into all the other kids at the zoo and climbing on things with them. He also loved running over all the hills and ramps and manhole covers. We ate our picnic lunch amongst ducks, geese, seagulls and sparrows, whom were all way too assertive in their quest for food.

His other "first" this week was ice cream. Actually he had frozen custard from Scooter's, which is Chicago's only custard stand (frozen custard is BIG in Wisconsin but not really anywhere else). He liked the vanilla which I fed him from my bowl and said "mmm." But he loved his Dad's chocolate cone even more; whined when it was all gone.

farmer's hours

2010-05-04T04:18:00.000-07:00

Eddie is on farmer's hours these days - goes down with the sun around 8 p.m. and wakes up with the sun, sometime between 5:30 - 6 a.m. It wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't still waking up throughout the night. Where does his energy, his lust for life come from? I wish I had some.

little daredevil

2010-04-29T05:30:00.000-07:00

The beauty of childhood - no fear. Eddie's latest activity is trying to figure out how to jump. He likes to stand on the arm of the sofa and then dive into the cushions squeling with delight. But he also tries to jump off the couch onto the floor and tumbles down carelessly. The other day I caught him doing his squatting, pre-jump wind up on the stairs and had to instruct him not to practice his jumping on the stairs. We have a wild one here!

bye bye and ball

2010-04-25T18:36:00.000-07:00

I was very proud of my son this weekend. As we were leaving our friends' house and were saying goodbye, Eddie waved bye bye. I know this is something that a lot of babies do way early, girls even at 10 months, but for Eddie this is a huge milestone. For the longest time I have been trying to get him to wave goodbye to people as they leave our house and he often will do nothing but smile until they actually leave. Once they have left he will often go to the window and stand on the chair to watch them and then wave, long after they have departed. So I knew that he could wave his hand, but was just waiting for him to do it at the appropriate time. I gave up several months ago. And then, bam, suddenly he just did it. He is totally this way about everything - he does things when HE wants to and at his own pace.

This is the sentiment I have been feeling about his language skills too. I called the pediatrician this week and left a message saying that I was still concerned as there had been no progress over the past two months in his speaking. And then suddenly this weekend he just seemed to bloom like a little flower. He is now saying "ball," even though the "l"s are sort of silent. He is not the type to just yell out the word when he sees it, but if you point to a ball or a picture of a ball and ask him "what's that?" he will say boisterously "BALL!" He is babbling even more now and making a lot of new sounds. He is becoming more emphatic with his "dada," "mama," "no," "oh no" and "yeah." And he is pointing to everything and showcasing that he knows what so many things are. For example, he will point to the lights on his trucks and then point up to the lights in the ceiling, as he utters sounds and looks with bright eyes for affirmation.

first popsicle

2010-04-25T18:26:00.000-07:00

Eddie had his first popsicle last week and repeatedly made the "mmm" sound he does to indicate when something is good.

outside

2010-04-20T05:27:00.000-07:00

It's 7 a.m. and 45 degrees and we are outside. Eddie loves to play outside and these days it feels like the only breaks he takes is to come in and eat, and even then sometimes we cannot pull him away. He practices his golf swing, attempts to ride his tricycle and likes to find rocks and other objects to throw. Our neighbors gave us their old slide and swing set, and he likes to go down the slide over and over again.

terrible

2010-04-10T10:22:00.001-07:00

Eddie is officially in his "terrible twos" stage. His Dad said this a few weeks ago. If "terrible twos" is characterized by extreme emotional outbursts of expression that usually culminate in throwing oneself on the floor, throwing of objects in a fit of rage and general menace-like behavior, than yes, Eddie is in his terrible twos. The collapsing to the floor occurs really anytime he wants something and is refused, or if you go to try to pick him up to remove him from a situation and he wants to remain in his troubling endeavor, then he will become boneless and collapse in a whiny fit. Of course he loves to throw balls, but he also will throw something when upset, as in on the changing table, which he hates more than anything. As he tries to scoot off of it backwards, he will throw lotions and such at our heads. And of course he loves to throw his food now. I didn't realize how messy and annoying this is until today, since I am without a dog. Perhaps the worst of it all is that he has no willingness to please and often does the exact opposite of what we say. He seems to get a real charge out of this. I am constantly telling him NOT to eat certain things and yet he consistently repeats his consumption of nasty inedibles, such as crayons, chalk, hair gel, toothpaste, dirt, citrus rinds, flowers, lotion, soap. You name it and he has tasted it...and oddly seems to like it. When I get serious and tell him to look me in the face or get upset and raise my voice in a stern "NO," he laughs. He will often run away from us, giggling, of course. I am thinking that maybe I have too high of expectations of him. I think that he is capable of doing tasks like coloring a picture or helping me prepare biscuits, and yet activities end in abrupt frustration because he consumes the crayons or stuffs flour into his mouth vigorously. Maybe I need to leave him to play with balls and trucks and run around, and not try to do more civilized things like arts & crafts projects. And maybe my eagerness to DO things overtakes the realistic notion that he is a toddler. Take today, for example. I thought going to the garden center to buy seeds and some tools would be fun. We would look at flowers and a koi pond and cool objects. And he did enjoy it, and luckily we got there before it was too crowded so he could run around a bit. But the problem arose when we went to pay for our items and he spotted some cool glass balls, sort of garden art pieces, and colorful glass bud vases. I set him down because he was squirming too much and whining and I had to get my card out to pay, and of course the instant I set him down he reached for the bud vases and as I tried to intercept, I was too late and he knocked over one, which in turn knocked over who knows how many in a domino effect resulting in colorful shattered glass everywhere. As I tried to mitigate the mess, he found comfort in the arms of another woman - a long grey-haired woman scooped him up and told him it was alright. She just seemed to ooze the essence of calm and soothing...whereas I was the stern-faced, disappointed and embarrassed parent trying to scold and teach him a lesson. The workers magically cleaned it all in a matter of seconds and I don't think they charged me for the vases, as we bolted out of there and drove home in silence.

outside with cousin noah

2010-04-06T07:02:00.000-07:00

here are some shots of Eddie and Noah from a 70 degree day last week

our quiet easter

2010-04-04T17:45:00.000-07:00

Eddie had a 103 fever on Saturday forcing us to lay low for Easter and forego our plans to spend it with friends in the suburbs. Instead we had a quiet day at home, which included a blueberry pancake breakfast, gifts from Grandma Bonnie & Grandpa Rick and the Easter bunny, yard work outside and a ham dinner. Pretty festive, I guess, considering. Here are some highlights:

emotional intelligence

2010-03-25T11:22:00.000-07:00

All parents want their kid to be smart. But without the ability to communicate through the spoken word, intelligence is difficult to measure at this age. I am still anxiously awaiting Eddie's command of the English language to surface, and often struggle with whether I should have him checked out by a speech therapist to determine if there is a genuine problem (more on this in forthcoming posts, I presume). But I recognize that there is more to intelligence than the ability to speak, and even more beyond the typical definition of intellectual abilities. I think Eddie has a high emotional intelligence, which is often associated with one's social abilities. We started our new session of music class today; we have been attending a Music Together class since January and today started the new Spring session which meant that some of the participants were new and some weren't. Eddie recognized and approached all of the kids that had been in the class before. He went up to all of them at various moments in the class and shared his instruments or props with them and engaged in a toddler-like conversation, which involved the unspoken word. He didn't go up to any of the new kids. I thought this was pretty neat - that he recognizes familiar people and acknowledges that they are his "friends," and thus engages with them socially. Our babysitter, a nice woman named Sandra who watches Eddie occasionally, recently commented on his social skills after taking him to the park. She said, "you have a sweetie," and that it is so interesting to watch him play with and observe the other kids. I take this as a major compliment because I know that Sandra watches a lot of different kids and she probably sees a lot of different behaviors. People always comment on how smiley Eddie is; he always greets people with a smile, which is a great characteristic for a young kid to have, I think...but he is not naive in his social cues; he recognizes when someone is a stranger and waits to see what our response is, and then, and only then after we have conversed with this person in an upbeat manner, will he done his contagious smile.

early spring

2010-03-22T19:42:00.001-07:00

We throughly enjoyed last week's spring preview of 60 degree weather. We went to the park every day, played outside with our neighbors and of course spent a lot of time in out backyard. Here are some shots from last Thursday (note that this was day 1 of Eddie's cold so he probably has some snot in these pics):

our little helper

2010-03-22T19:04:00.001-07:00

Eddie has been really in to placing objects - I don't know exactly what the proper term for this developmental skill is, but it is a sort of adult-like imitation and gesture or willingness to help. The cutest is how he will set the table for dinner. He will take the placemats and put them on the table. He will push his high chair to the table. And he will take the silverware and place it on the table. One day while we were unloading the dishwasher (which I always have him help me with), he started to take the silverware into the dining room. And of course he placed it on the table. Too cute. Sometimes when I am folding laundry he will take the clothes one by one and put them back in the washing machine. This is more of an annoyance, but still pretty darn cute. And this weekend, since it was wet and chilly, we built a fire. We had the wood in the other room, simply because there wasn't space right by the fire, and all of a sudden there comes Eddie walking into the living room with a huge log of wood! Of course he didn't add it to the fire himself, but he had fun making a mess with all the little wood piece and then cleaning them up with a dustpan. There are so many of these moments lately that it is impossible to capture them all on film. But below are some recent photos that showcase his eagerness to help.

Helping Dad shovel...actually, shoveling as Dad builds a snowman!

Helping Dad build a fire

"Helping" Mom with laundry...but really just having fun in his "spaceship" of a laundry basket

welcome alex the great!

2010-03-19T19:10:00.000-07:00

Eddie has a new cousin! Alexander Charles Washuk was born 3-18-10 in Los Angeles to proud parents Katie and Charlie. I show Eddie photos of his new cousin and he smiles, big and wide. He can't wait to have a new buddy to play with. Alex is a very good looking newborn...he kinda looks similar to Eddie's newborn mug, no?

another cold

2010-03-19T11:25:00.001-07:00

You have another cold. It started with some sneezing on Wednesday and yellow snot on Thursday and now today, Friday, it has moved into your lungs and you sound like a wheezing old smoker with a cough like a seal. It is the same progression your last cold took, so I think this chest wheezing should only last a day. Nevertheless, it is still scary to listen to your heaving chest and your sickly moans as you try to move around, but then just tucker out and want to be held. But you never sit still - even while reading books - still wriggling, so eager to move onto the next thing, so unsettled that it makes me feel even worse for you because you seem beyond comforting. When you are sick like this I feel paralyzed by the worry. I want to sleep by your side and make sure you drift off into a peaceful sleep, but you will have none of that. You want to be alone with your blankies as you motion for me to leave the room. I stand outside your door, waiting for you to settle. I try to go about my chores. I turn on the monitor for the first time in many months, just to listen to you breathe.

my big fat cut lip

2010-03-13T11:14:00.000-08:00

I literally thought we were going to have to go to the ER this week, or at least see a doctor or pediatric dentist. Eddie was going down the outdoor cement stairs that gain access to our basement and tried to step down the bottom stair like a big boy without holding onto anything and he face planted right into the cement. I scooped him up as he wailed and hurried him inside as blood gushed from his mouth and he flapped his hands around. I pressed a cold wet washcloth to his mouth but had a hard time figuring out exactly where the wound was and if he had lost any teeth. He was so frazzled and upset, wriggling around and not letting me see the inside of his mouth. I called my husband and said, "I think I'm gonna need you to come home. Eddie fell and we may have to go to the hospital." Shortly thereafter though I got him to nurse which combatively calmed him down and caused the bleeding to stop - they say breastmilk heals all wounds - literally, it can heal a cut because of the antibodies in it. And I was then able to see that his teeth were all still in tact and the wound was a cut on the inside of his bottom lip with minor scrapes on his chin, fingers and knee. He was fine and even managed to be a wild man at the park that afternoon. I swear, this kid WILL end up in the ER at least once before he turns 5, I just know it. Although he can be cautious at times, he is also wild and fearless. Today while at the Nature Museum he ran full force into a mirror and fell backwards. Everyone around us was like, oh my god, is he okay. He didn't even cry. His dad beamed and said, "oh yeah, he's fine. He's a hockey player."

poopy spring

2010-03-10T18:05:00.000-08:00

Spring is now my least favorite season. Maybe I would feel differently if I didn't have a dog that tracks mud into the house and a little boy who seems to love the mud, wanting to explore the earth as it magically appears from under the blanket of snow and ice that was winter. Problem is that when the snow melts, not only does the yard turn to muck, but it exposes all the winter poops. This year we have the added caveat of a bunny rabbit living under our deck whom has turned our yard into a fecal-filled terror zone. And of course Eddie wants to run all over the place. Today my biggest fear came true. Eddie picked up one of Marty's poops! My reaction was akin to a mother seeing her child dart out into moving traffic - I screamed his name in such a blood-curdling way that I hope the neighbors didn't hear. It all occurred in sort of slow motion. I turned around to run inside and get his coat (he had darted out the door as I let Marty out) and when I returned into view, I saw him dancing around with a poop in his hand. The horror. Luckily it was an older, firmer poop and not a new moist one...luckily he didn't discovered the few piles of diarrhea that Marty had created this weekend. Gross. I just picked him up and somehow I guess it fell out of his hand, or maybe he dropped it as I yelled, I dunno, it is all such a blur. I just picked him up and carried him inside and washed his hands like 50 times. I don't know if I will make it through the spring without having a heart attack.

tantrums

2010-03-10T17:55:00.000-08:00

This weekend Eddie really started throwing tantrums. I thought maybe it was in reaction to the fact that I went out Friday and Saturday night, or maybe it was because his routine was thrown off, or maybe just because. Probably the latter. Up until this point his tantrums were really just major bouts of whining, but now he is arching his back if you are holding him, flinging himself to the ground and rolling around or just lying there wailing. Luckily he has yet to pull this in a public setting. It really only occurs during a transition - when we make a change in activities or location. And occurs most frequently when he is outside and we tell him we have to go in, or we try to prevent him from doing something outside, like running around on the poop-covered lawn. The other place he flips out is on the changing table - still hates to have his diaper changed and although it got better for awhile with some new songs and distractions, it is now back to being at the all-time worst with him literally trying to climb down the changing table to escape from the perils of a diaper change. He is also getting more upset when we are out and about and have to put him in his carseat to go home. So I am going to make up a new transition song specifically for car rides. My other transition song that we say whenever we have to change activities is "we had fun, now we're done." It seems to really help. Maybe there will have to be another song for when we have to stop playing outside and go inside...

television

2010-03-03T11:24:00.000-08:00

Winters are tough on all of us that live in the northern hemisphere. The cold keeps us indoors with limited activities, especially for a toddler who is eager to explore. And so it is only natural that the TV gets turned on a tad more than we would like. I used to turn on the XM music stations and we would bop around to the tunes of Kids Place Live or just have classical music going on in the background. And then Direct TV changed services and we no longer get Kids Place Live, sadly. Holiday time came and we exposed Eddie to some of the classic holiday specials. A new Disney animated special called "Prep and Landing," which is creatively all about the elves that help Santa get it all done, became his favorite. On weekends when Dad would wake up with Eddie as Mom would sleep in, they would sit and watch "Prep and Landing." This routine then spread from being a weekend-only thing, to an every-day-thing, at least when he would wake up earlier than 7 a.m. because it just felt nice to have some quiet time to unload the dishwasher or make breakfast while Eddie would veg on the chair or couch and stare intently at the screen. Then we started to explore what else was on during the mornings and discovered some cute shows on PBS, including "Curious George," "Sid the Science Kid" and "Super Why." Most recently, the Olympics captivated us and it hardly seemed wrong to watch our athletes compete, despite the excessive commericals. And suddenly Eddie's occasional interest became a regular thing. He started to hand me the remote to turn on the TV. Ok, I turn it on and turn on the music channels. He whines and hands the remote back to me until I turn on a program he is interested in. I allow it because a) it gets him to sit still for awhile and eat his breakfast/lunch/snack, something that was a challenge for awhile, b) it's not like he is not highly active; he is always playing hockey, running around and climbing on everything, c) he is in no way at risk to be obese (only weighs 23 lbs. and is in the 10th percentile for weight) and lastly d) selfishly, it is nice to have a free moment to get housework done...and I am an avid follower of the shows too! But, it does get to me. I know that watching TV is a bad habit, and to support my son's consumption of it feels wrong to me in so many different ways. So I am now vowing to decrease our consumption of it. I know that the weather will be getting nicer soon and it is a hell of a lot easier to play in the backyard or go for a walk to the park when you don't have to get a squirmy toddler all bundled up, but I am going to start now, even with the snow still on the ground, to modify some of our habits to keep us away from the two luminous plasma screens in our kitchen/living space and basement. Today for the first time we sat and ate a snack at the dining room table. It felt really nice. I will sacrifice my free time to get stuff done, but that is okay. It is more important to develop good behaviors and habits now. I am starting to realize that we can't treat Eddie like a baby anymore, as in, we cannot let him and his desires dictate our lives...we are the parents and need to start parenting. This is a hard transition for me and although we have been dealing with it for so long in the sleep department, now I need to start stepping it up as a parent in our daily lives too. Most of the day Eddie calls the shots - if he wants to go downstairs, we go downstairs, if he wants to be picked up to explore the fruit bowl, I pick him up, but sometimes I have to call the shots too. First goal: limit television consumption.

worth it?

2010-02-21T18:40:00.000-08:00

We went to the aquarium on Wednesday with my friend Carrie and her two kids. Of course Eddie had a ball pressing up against all the glass and starring at various species swimming, but now he is sick with a bad cold and I cannot help but think he caught it that day. And although I enjoyed hanging out with my friend, the whole experience was one big ball of stress and anxiety, making me wonder, is it all worth it? I mean, all the things we do for our kids, are they really for our kids or just for us to parents to feel like we are being good parents? I have struggled with the right balance between protecting Eddie from the cold and flu season pandemics and exposing him to new places, people and things. Doing anything in Chicago is accompanied with a certain amount of stress that I don't ever remember feeling growing up in Milwaukee. The parking, the paying for parking, the walking, the carrying all the gear, the bundling up just to sweat while you walk and want to strip it all off, the lines, the waiting, the crowds, the germs, the numerous elevators you have to take just because you have a stroller, more waiting, getting hungry and lightheaded, finding a place to sit and eat, refusing to eat "fast" food, wiping down all the surfaces my son may touch while we sit and eat, washing the hands, drying the hands, eating our snacks but wishing we had more food, wiping the hands and face, refusing to use a public bathroom even though you really have to pee and probably should change a diaper, putting a squirmy kid back in the stroller so you can walk back to your car, bundling up again, sweating again, the walk to the car, the search for the keys, the struggle to buckle him in his car seat, driving round and round and round an enclosed parking garage that makes you feel so nauseous and on edge as you try not to hit any other cars since they are all way too tightly parked, the drive home with a whinny kid, the drive home with a sleeping kid, wondering when/if he will wake up. Twenty minutes later we are home, ahhh, and he wakes up. I wish he could tell me he had so much fun...maybe that would make it all worth it.

to all the ladies

2010-02-15T07:34:00.000-08:00

By now all of our girl friends should have received their valentines. It was quite a process. He loves to color, especially with markers, and there was many a marks all over the hands. Here are some shots of Eddie working on his valentines:

a sweet day

2010-02-14T19:35:00.000-08:00

Heart-shaped blueberry pancakes and playing in the snow while wearing your moose pajamas, what could be better than this? I think this as I wash morning dishes and watch you frolic in the glistening snow, maneuvering your shovel as you mimic your dad. We shared this valentines day with two other couples, their baby and one baby-to-be still in utero. We dined on elk tenderloin and mushroom risotto. As usual you ate all of your meat and greens, swapped forks with mom and reached for many wine glasses and knives. Jill remarked, "you can tell Eddie is the son of a chef" as you played in their kitchen taking muffin pans and cheese graters out of the cabinets. These days you want to be in the kitchen with me more and more. You want to explore every surface, especially the espresso machine and the fruit bowl, taking bites out of lemons and dumping coffee beans into the machine. You are so eager to taste, to try anything and everything. Even your lotion is frosting to you.

rock n' rolla

2010-02-07T18:38:00.000-08:00

We had a busy Saturday. Eddie attended his first concert, kid music artist Ralph's World. He loved it! He was dancing right from the get go and enjoyed running all over and playing with older kids. I included a video clip below, but beware that the sound is awful - we were standing way too close to the speaker. After about four songs up front I decided it probably wasn't the best thing for his ears and we moved to the back. Then that evening we attended my friend Carrie's son's third birthday party at a jumperoo place; translation: a warehouse filled with tons and tons of inflated jumping apparatuses and slides. The party theme was pajama so you will note Eddie's wearing his hockey long johns.

sleep, revisited

2010-02-02T18:44:00.000-08:00

So the blog has been a bit quiet lately in the sleep department, but that is only because I have censored it from you readers. Sleep is still, and has been, a major struggle for us, but I am pleased to report that I finally see a light at the end of the tunnel. Any progress we might of made last Fall to establish healthy sleep routines all went out the window during holiday season and the few colds we got. And so once Eddie was healthy again, and ultimately once I was healthy again too after my bout of stomach flu, I vowed to myself, this is it, we HAVE to do something. Lack of sleep has taken its toll on us and I know it is related to me getting sick. It is no fun to be a mom when you are sick. And so I fervently sought the assistance of a friend of a friend whom is a sort of sleep consultant; we have been in communication now since last summer and she has supported all of my natural instincts, as in to continue breastfeeding and soothe him to sleep and not let him cry. But suddenly now she is turning it up a notch and taking the role of a coach; the type of coach that blows a whistle loud and hard, the type of coach that makes you run sprints when the ball drops without an attempt to save it. She is pushing me to be in control of my family's well-being...through sleep training, yet again.

And so here we are again listening to the wails and whines of our little guy. Our first step was to address our sleep routine during the day. Instead of allowing him to fall asleep on the boob before a nap, I now feed him with the lights on or in another room and put in into his crib while he is still awake. It took a week of doing this before I could claim success; he now goes into his crib all on his own and nuzzles into his blankies and falls asleep without any cries or whines. Then we modified the same routine at the end of the day. Again, instead of turning the lights off during our nursing, we now leave the lights on so that he doesn't fall asleep on the boob and I put him into his crib drowsy but awake. This is successful 90% of the time; there are still evenings when he is exhausted and falls asleep on me. But he never makes a peep when he is placed into his crib, as if to say that he is tired and knows that his bed is the best place for him to be. And then the hardest part of the training, which is to not go to him when he wakes up in the middle of night. This is the stage we are in now. We have to allow him the opportunity to fall back to sleep on his own, and then soon, hopefully his hormones will regulate and he will cease to wake up so much in the middle of the night. Friday night he woke up at 11 pm and cried for 5 minutes and then fell back asleep. Yey. But then Dad came home from a hockey game and Marty barked and Eddie woke up at 11:30 and then seemed to fall back asleep, but then I heard him cry again around 12:15. So I went to him. He didn't eat much at dinner, so I fed him. And I didn't feel bad about this decision. He slept until 4 a.m. and then cried a bit and fell back to sleep. Woke up at 8 a.m. Great! Saturday/Sunday is now a blur and I cannot remember the details, but I know we let him cry at one point and I think I went to him once, around 4 a.m. and then we woke up at 7. Then last night he officially slept through the night - went to bed at 7:30 and woke up at 6 a.m. Not bad, not bad. As they say in one of my favorite '90s movies Major League, "starting to come together, starting to come together."

waiting for words

2010-01-27T18:35:00.000-08:00

I am stealing this blog title from my sister. She write this as her son Noah turns six months and begins his "ohs" and "ahs." I write this as the mom of the 17 month old boy who still just utters nothingness. Well, not complete nothingness, but I am beginning to get a tad anxious and a bit concerned that he may need speech therapy.

Here are his utterances:
"da da" = daddy, obviously, but also indicates anything that reminds him of daddy; like today I whispered the word "snack" into his ear because if I say it out loud Marty will start to bark, and when I whispered he giggled and said "da da." I realized that he did this because his da da whispers nursery rhymes into his ear.
"ma ma" and sometimes a "mom" = yours truly
"daw" = dog; sometimes he will utter a delayed "ggg" sound too
"kk" = car and/or truck
"na na" = no

But he understands soooo much. One of his favorite books right now is this "Organic Baby First Words" book which just has pictures of objects and words. He knows banana, apple, duck, plane, keys, ball...and many more. He knows his body parts. He can follow/respond to most commands, like "go get your boots" or "put your fireman in the driver seat of the fire truck." He has babbling conversations too. He seems to say "all done" a lot, like when done eating or done with a diaper change. And he also seems to say "yeah" or "nah" when I ask him questions. On a daily basis I am not frustrated at all by his communication skills. But I so look forward to being able to have a conversation, even if it is broken down into simple phrases like "me want" and "go outside" and "green tree." And so I still feel a tad concerned that he is not forming more intelligible words. We will see what the doctor says next month.

water, hockey, climbing, na-na

2010-01-27T18:07:00.001-08:00

These are Eddie's most favorite things right now. I swear he would play with/in water all day if he could. Of course he still loves bath time - earlier this month he gave his grandparents a show while he laid down horizontally in the water and splashed around as if swimming. These days he is a bit more calm in the bath and enjoys his new bath books. But his new water obsession is the kitchen facuet, well really any facuet. He loves to wash his hands, which I guess is a good thing. And I made the mistake of allowing him onto the kitchen island one afternoon and he quickly discovered how to turn the kitchen sick facuets on and off, splashing around with such intensity. He is part mad scientist, part amphibian.

He has a genuine love for hockey. Numerous times throughout the day, I would say at least three times, he will run to the basement down and whine to go downstairs so that he can grab his sticks and hit pucks into the net. If you utter the word "hockey" he will run to the basement door. Once I made the mistake of saying to him while he was eating, "you have to eat so you can grow up big and strong and play hockey" and he literally leapt out of his high chair to run downstairs. He also knows the words for "stick" and "puck" and "score." I bet your average 17 month old doesn't have those in their vocabulary.

Climbing. If he wasn't playing with water or playing hockey Eddie would be climbing something. He climbs onto every chair with ease. He scales up chairs and onto tables. He cascades over cushions on the couch and aims high for pictures and mirrors hanging on the wall. He just wants to be higher and higher these days.

Dr. Barry Brazelton talks about the increasing "negativism" at this age - the struggle between supporting your toddlers self-assertion and disciplining them to define limits to protect them. And so one of the most popular words of toddlers is "no." Eddie's version of no is "na na." He says it to acknowledge that he knows something is a no-no. He says it while pointing to the oven, while pointing to glass bottles, while attempting to bite his dad and even sometimes amidst one of his climbing attempts. Although discipline does not come naturally to me, I have had to step up and set some limits. Sometimes I am shocked by now much I am saying "no" these days, Like, no Eddie, "we don't play in the garbage," or "Eddie, remember, no going by Marty while she's eating, we can't bother her while she's eating," or "no, the toliet is not for playing, it's for making poopies and potties." Sometimes it's like he doesn't listen or rather, doesn't care to obey. I can pull him away from Marty's dish while she's eating, and then he just runs right back to it. But I am noticing some progress the more we repeat these lessons. Actually, I can't even recall the last time I had to pull him away from Marty while she was eating as it hasn't seemed to occur at all this week.

I guess this is his 17 month update. It has been a rough month of sickness - first Eddie with a 10 day cold and then me with a 3 day stomach flu. But it has also been a good start to a new year with our new music class and new play group. Eddie is truly a good, social kid and I am assured of this the more I see him interact with others, and the more I observe the others and some of their undesirable behaviors. Eddie is gentle, focused, kind, curteous, passionate, independent and downright fun.

a regression

2010-01-13T09:55:00.000-08:00

Lately I feel like there has been a regression in, how can I say it accurately/appropriately, some of Eddie's habits/behavior. In particular sleeping and nursing. And in many ways the two go hand in hand. See I created this ritual of nursing Eddie to sleep when he was an infant - it is only natural, especially for a high-needs, colicky baby like he was. This ritual continued well beyond the colic stage and throughout various stages of development Eddie continued to fall asleep at the breast. I just got really good at waiting for the perfect moment to de-latch him, sliding my nipple from his dropped jaw, and ever so gingerly laying him in his crib where he would most often just roll onto his belly and continue to drift into deeper sleep. There have been pockets of time where he has not needed the boob to fall asleep, sometimes even refusing it outright, or mostly just nursing for a tad and then de-latching himself and I put him down and he falls asleep on his own. These are the good moments, success in our sleep trials and tribulations. But the last month or so has been bad. Between sleeping more away from home over the holidays and being sick, the system has resorted back to the newborn-like habit of falling asleep on mom. Even worse now is that he consistently awakens when I go to de-latch him and then he gets really upset when I transfer him to his crib, often never falling back asleep and thereby avoiding a nap altogether, unless you count the 20-30 minutes he spent on the boob. And when we're away from home I do whatever I can to mitigate his crying altogether so as not to wake others in the house, which means spending even more time with him, sometimes up to 1.5 hours, to get him to fall asleep and transfer into the pack in play successfully. Argh. It's exhausting just writing about it.

During the day, he suddenly wants to nurse all the time, like a newborn. I swear it is like every 3 hours or so. He whines to be picked up or held and then tugs at my shirt. I know that a lot of it was because he was sick, and I always think that it is good for him to breastfeed when sick to ensure good fluid intake. But it also concerns me because it seems like then he doesn't eat as much real food. For the first time since last summer, I had to pump the other night because I got engorged - he is drinking so much that my body must think that I have a 3 month old, not a 16 month old!

Breastfeeding is a beautiful thing. The older Eddie gets, the better it gets, in a way. It is hard to explain. A toddler seems to go through constant shifts of emotion and energy. One moment ferociously chasing a ball, one moment whining for help in a task, one moment giggling in pleasure at his own conquests. And in the breakdown moments, when exhausted and frustrated, the most natural thing for me to do is scoop him up into my arms and sit down with him to see if he needs comforting. Nine times out of ten he will tug at my shirt and we will share an intimate moment together that helps calm our nerves, lower our blood pressure and heart rate and releases endorphins, making us both feel so relaxed, so at ease, and ready to take on the next task whether it be naptime or playtime. How could anyone, mom or child, not want this? And yet I have to start to modify the ritual, in particular pre-bedtime/naptime, because it is starting to take its toll on our sleep quality. I have to start to, gulp, wean him. This will be one of the hardest things I ever have to do, dare I say.

sick again

2010-01-10T19:01:00.000-08:00

After the grandparents left on Tuesday Eddie came down with a cold. What started off as the occasional exclamatory cough turned into a full blown mucous-filled hack by Tuesday night. And by Wednesday the nose was running too. On Thursday he looked the worst - cheeks reddened from sleep-smeared snot and eyes all glossy. But overall his mood and energy was pretty normal, and he never had a fever. Finally today, Sunday, he seems to be on the road to recovery. After not leaving the house for almost a week we finally bundled him up and took him outside to play in the mounds of snow. It's a tough time of year, and now that Eddie is a toddler, I have accepted the fact that he is going to get sick. Yet that didn't prevent me from starting to feel bad about the fact that this is the third cold he has had this cold/flu season...yet last year he never got sick, and I feel incredibly grateful for that. But then I read that the average baby get 8 colds in the first two years of life...so he is still way below average for sickness. I try to think that getting sick now is good because it will help build his immune system. But it is still hard to see your child not well. Here's to hoping that this week is a better one.

christmas, part two

2010-01-08T10:40:00.000-08:00

Grandma Bonnie and Grandpa Rick came for the annual post-Christmas visit and showered E4 with more gifts, including a Radio Flyer tricycle which we have yet to put together. Highlights of the visit included a big turkey dinner, a brunch out at John's Place in Roscoe Village, a trip to Navy Pier for Winter Wonderland and we checked out a new play space called Family Grounds Cafe where Eddie frolicked with other toddlers.

Eddie sports his new Boston Red Sox windbreaker

His favorite gift, by far, a Cabbage Patch Kid named Pierre Albert!

Wearing his gift from Uncle Charlie

Dad and son in matching flannels

Checking out the ice rink...gearing up for hockey

Watching a train go by

a reflection

2009-12-30T18:07:00.000-08:00

2009 is about to come to a close and I am reminded of how much Eddie has grown and developed this year as I watch my nephew Noah today. Back in January Eddie was where Noah is at; playing on the floor, sometimes rolling over, grasping at small objects and gnawing on everything with that animalistic vengeance only a teething baby has. And now...well he is officially running around, climbing on everything in sight and trying his best at imitating whatever his Dad does. At 16 months he is now, well, a sort of menace at times. He unplugs the Christmas tree lights, grabs at the blind cords and pulls them hard, taunts Marty with his food and tries to steal her food, plays in the toilet, i.e. flushes it repeatedly, tears toilet paper into little pieces and then splashes in the water and is into biting us, amongst other pesky behavior. But, on the other hand, he has developed into this sweet little cuddling machine. He has these moments throughout the day where he will just come and climb into your arms or sit right next to you and nuzzle. His big thing now is that he can climb onto the sofa and chairs and he will do so and just chill for awhile, or grab the remote and try to turn on the tv or change channels. He will also nuzzle on our bed and in Marty's dog bed. His movements are more like a little boy and less like a baby. Lately he has become sort of clingy though, always wanting to be held. But it is mostly because he wants to be a part of our world, a world that exists at 5 feet high and above; he wants to grab at anything on the counter, such as pens and paper, San Pellegrino bottles or a cell phone or remote control. He wants to sit at the table and eat with a fork and knife; he has his own forks now and has mastered them pretty well. He wants to drink whatever we are drinking, and eat whatever we are eating. He is still a good eater, most of the time, but several times a day he seems to just give away half of his food to Marty. He is still not saying any recognizable words, although DOG seems to be close as he points to them in books and says "DAW" or repeats this when he hears a dog bark. But he understands so much. I can ask him to get his boots, and he will retrieve them. or you can say, "where is the ball?" and he will go find one. There are so many other examples of such that I cannot list them all, but it is a huge milestone when your child responds to your words, even if the response is an action and not in actual language yet.

In 2010 I look forward to our new music class which starts next week, learning to ride a tricycle (a gift from Grandma Bonnie that arrived today), planting our veggie garden in the spring and playing with worms, going to the zoo (we never made it in '09), swimming with cousin Noah, a trip to LA (for Uncle Charlie's wedding and to meet baby Alex), another summer in Maine and words, spoken words...this is what I am most excited for.

this christmas

2009-12-29T10:23:00.000-08:00

Eddie's second Christmas was full of snow and presents. We went up to my parents' on the 23rd amidst a heavy snowfall. Christmas Eve highlights included Eddie building a snowman with his Dad and a dinner with traditional Maine lobster stew, which E3 and I prepared together, our first joint culinary effort. Christmas morning Santa came; E4 woke around 6:30 a.m. and we showed him his presents under the tree. He went for a big bouncy ball first and then slowly but surely discovered all his other gifts including Legos, a caterpillar pull toy, a glockenspeil/xylophone, a small Grover doll (because he loves the story "Monster at the End of This Book,") a Mr. Potato Head, a forklift truck and various books. Then my sister, Mike and Noah arrived and we went to the country club for an early dinner. Afterward we visited with family friends, the Duchelles. The 26th we celebrated our family Christmas with Noah and Eddie stealing the show for most gifts. Snow fell again and we all went sledding (or sliding as they call it in Maine). Eddie loved it. Laughed and smiled the whole time. Went sledding again on Sunday. And a magical end to an overall magical Christmas - after a busy morning of outdoor play, Eddie fell asleep on Gramps' lap...something he hasn't done since he was a newborn. He was watching the Packers play and just passed out in Gramps' arms...too cute.

one nap

2009-12-15T12:10:00.000-08:00

I want to report that Eddie is now consistently only taking one nap. For the past month he was taking sometimes one nap, sometimes two, which made making plans with anyone very frustrating, so I am quite pleased that he is now on a one nap schedule. I thought I would miss his morning nap because it also gave me a chance to nap too, if needed, but I actually like knowing that we have at least four hours from the time to wakes up until he will need to nap, which means we can get a lot more done. His nap now lasts about two hours, which has been great this week as I am busy with holiday chores. Gotta go finish the cards...

dog dog

2009-12-15T12:00:00.000-08:00

One could argue that Eddie's first word is "dog." For the past week or so anytime he sees Marty he utters something that sounds like "dog dog." The "g" is not as defined as the d, and at first I just thought he was saying "da da" because it is his syllabal of choice, but more and more it seems to sound like dog. Or he could be trying to say "good dog" since this is the title of one of his favorite books "Good Dog Carl." Whatever the case, dog and baby are the best of pals these days. Eddie loves to feed Marty by throwing food from his high chair, or if he has a snack while walking around he will taunt Marty by handing her some and then not letting go and laughing. Sometimes wherever Marty is laying, Eddie will go and try to lie down beside her. And today after running some Xmas shopping errands (which I must report he is a VERY good shopper), Eddie was estatic when we returned to the car and Marty was there waiting for us with her wagging tail and sloppy wet kisses.

festive weekend

2009-12-08T18:03:00.000-08:00

Eddie had a festive weekend despite his continual runny nose - he was congested shortly after Thanksgiving and the nose started running last Wednesday and is still going. Snotty face and sticky hands; this was my other idea for a blog entry since it seems like every kid right now has a cold. We have taught Eddie how to blow his nose, which is good, but he often runs away from me when I pull the tissue out. I apologize for the lack of focus, the lack of blog entries lately. But Eddie is now primarily only taking one nap which means I have even less time to myself to attack the computer - we cannot use the computer, or our cell phones, in Eddie's presence otherwise he pounces on the technology and throws a fit if we take it away from him.

Anyway, back to our weekend. In my family we celebrated St. Nicholas' Day, which is December 6th. St. Nicholas was believed to be the original 'Santa Claus' in the sense that he was the first to drop gifts down a chimney. The legend goes that a poor man's daughters did not have money for a dowry and one night St. Nick came and dropped gold coins down their chimney and the money landed in stockings they had left hung by the fire to dry. So on St. Nick's Eve we put out stockings and they get filled with little goodies by the morning. Eddie didn't put out a stocking per se, but I did let him pick out a stocking from the several we had. And it was filled with some new tinker toys and books that seemed to excited and overwhelm him. He was taken by the first item, a book, and didn't even think that there may be more in the stocking. So precious. He also attended a very festive holiday party on Saturday hosted by my husband's boss. We walked to the party, as they live only a few blocks away, and they even had a stroller valet...that was just the beginning of the extreme organization, thoughtfulness and over-the-topness of this party. Needless to say Eddie was mesmerized by all the commotion and as we were leaving squirmed away and ran back into the party; he is quite the social butterfly. On Sunday we had our friends Bryce & Hilary over with their baby Mack who is 11 weeks. And we walked down the street to Roscoe where they were having various holiday events and promotions at the stores. One store hosted Santa and so we took Eddie and baby Mack. We knew that Eddie would do one of three things, either stare intensely at him, smile at him or cry. I don't want to give away his reaction entirely because it will be a component of our Christmas card this year, but let's just say I don't think we adequately prepared him for what we were doing.

On Monday it snowed! The first snow of the year always makes me happy because it feels more genuinely like the Christmas season. I put on Eddie's new boots and he ran around in the snow giggling. Today it snowed more and I showed him how to make a snowball. Wow. That was really cool to him and he tried to replicate it.

stairs

2009-12-02T18:15:00.000-08:00

Eddie starting walking down the stairs today. All day long I was trying to get him to do it but he would just reach out for me to carry him down the steps like I always do. And then all of a sudden this evening he went down the bottom half of our staircase while holding onto the banister, all by himself. Crazy. Video footage will be forthcoming.

thanksgiving weekend

2009-11-29T18:11:00.000-08:00

We spent Thanksgiving in Appleton, WI with our cousins. Eddie had a blast playing with all of Sophia's toys. Sophie, on the other hand, was not so enthused by Eddie's presence and every time he tried to socialize with her, she would just run away. The item he seemed to play with the most was her baby doll stroller and bottles - this was to Gramps' dismay as he proclaimed "don't let him play with dolls!" But I just asserted that we want him to grow up to be a good daddy...and even more so, to be a good big brother when the time comes. He reacquainted himself with the toy turkey which made him smile again this year. And he liked being held by tall cousin Johnny. The rest of the weekend we enjoyed the nice weather and spent a lot of time outdoors, watching the ducks and helping Nonni plant tulip bulbs. Inside the house Eddie perfected his skills of going down several stairs and getting off of a bed by himself. Cousin Noah and his parents came up to visit for only a day because he was sick with a fever.

15 for 15

2009-11-21T18:29:00.000-08:00

Eddie turned 15 months this week. Becoming more and more of a toddler every day. Trip to the doctor for a check-up went well. He now weighs 21 lbs. 9 ozs., still in the 25th percentile, and is 31 and 3/4 inches, 75th percentile for height. I thought I'd do something a tad different this month and just share 15 great new things about him:

15. His tumbling. He loves to roll around on the floor, and loves it even more if you join him for a tumble. He also does that bent-over-looking-through-his-legs position that makes it look as if he is about to do a somersault.
14. His new found love for Marty. Sometimes he just walks up to her and strokes her coat so gently. Sometimes he grabs at her face and she licks him back. He also likes to feed her directly from his hand.
13. His ability to share. He loves to share his food with us, feed us by placing the food directly in our mouths or in our hands. He can also hand over objects if you ask for them, although he mostly just does a psyche and gestures to hand you the object but then never lets go of it. He smiles. He is so proud of himself.
12. Books. I swear the kid is crazy about his books and is very independent about reading these days. He carries his books into little corners of the house and sits there and flips through pages. Board books, big kid books, mommy's books, magazines, really anything and everything legible he wants to get ahold of.
11. Pens. He always wants to have a pen if he sees one or after seeing me use one. And then he will motion around on the floor that he is "writing." Maybe he will be a writer like his Grandma and Aunt.
10. Putting on shoes. He is not able to do it yet but he makes attempts and it is so cute. He often tries to put on my shoes too.
9. Blankie and Kiki. He has two of the same blankie - I bought a second one to have in case something happened to the first one and to have for when I need to wash the other one. Well he found the second blankie right away and so now he has two blankies and he loves them. He carries them everywhere - luckily though he dosesn't need to have them, as in we don't bring it with us outside of the house, but he is so happy when he has one. Kiki did go on an excursion this week though. I brought her to the doctor's office this week to give to him after he got his shots and he was so happy. He nuzzles his little face in the blankie and will often lie on the floor with it as if going to sleep. If you ask "where is blankie?" he will go find one. I named the second one Kiki because he repeats "kkkk" when he sees his blankie/s.
8. His independence. I love how he can just play and play and occupy himself without needing intervention. And how he loves to figure things out on his own. Like walking - he never went through that phase where the parent holds the kid's hands as they walk between their legs. He just did it himself. Now he is trying to step up and down and once again, he doesn't want our help at all. Sometimes I get a little jealous when I see other kids his age holding their parents' hands; he won't, I think because he isn't used to it because we let him walk by himself.
7. His dancing. There is something innate within humans to dance to music, right? Because it seems like all/most babies love to dance when they hear music. It is a pretty amazing thing. That an infant ear can detect sound and designate what is music and what is not. Eddie dances to everything from Beethoven to Johnny Cash to our own attempts to sing or hum or make music on the piano. He dances when I play a Kuhlau Sonatina and a tune like She'll Be Coming Round the Mountain...can't wait for Christmas music soon!
6. Gimmie five. His dad taught him how to do this.
5. His patience. His dad says that he got his focus and patience from his mom. It is evident with this magnetic puzzle he got from his friend Niah for his birthday. He can take the net, which has a string and a small magnet attached to it, and pull up the puzzle pieces from their small magnet center; it is something that takes precision and a whole lot of patience for a baby. And Eddie can do it. Another thing that impressed me the other day was he had a chapstick and was trying to set it on top of the garbage can and it kept rolling off. After it happened twice he figured out how to set the chapstick down ever so gingerly so as to make it stay put.
4. His new found love of cuddling. Along with his tumbling skills, Eddie now has become a total cuddler. If you sit on the floor he will run over to you and climb all over you and then hug you and sit in your lap. These are some of my favorite moments of the day.
3. Belly button. His favorite body part. Likes to find mine and poke at it.
2. Apples. His favorite food of the moment. He sees them in a bowl on the table and points to them and whines until I cut off a wedge and give it to him. He probably eats 2 whole apples a day.
1. Understanding. Even though he isn't saying much, all just babble and garble still, Eddie understands a lot. When I ask "do you want to go downstairs?" he will walk over to the stairs. When I say "do you want to play piano"" He will walk over to the piano and start hitting the keys. If I say "Let's go for a walk" he will go to the door and try to open it, or grab Marty's leash. Although I anxiously await for the day when he is able to verbally communicate back to me, I am content now that he is comprehending most of what we are saying.

nightmare on sesame street

2009-11-20T07:20:00.000-08:00

Eddie doesn't watch tv. The tv is really only on during the weekends when Daddy is around and we limit the intake to sports, often changing back over to our xmradio music station when the commercials get going. But since it is the 40th anniversary, and since it was such a major part of my own childhood, I decided to let Eddie watch a bit of Sesame Street yesterday. I turned it on while he was still in his high chair, finishing up breakfast. The first skit was a take on 'High School Musical' - a bunch of muppets singing 'Pre-School Musical' and the sight of all these creatures bobbing up and down and squealing in high-pitched tones literally made Eddie cry. The next skit was with this new character whose name I think is Murray - a big red floppy hyper thing that interacts with people on the street. I have to say that the whole skit made my own head spin. It felt like the producers were on crack or heavy doses of caffeine. The pace was just so fast, so loud, so in-your-face. It made me realize that this is what our society, in particular, our youth, are all about - fast-paced hyperness. Scary. Luckily the next skit was with Bert & Ernie and had a familiar banter and slow, yet up-beat tune. Eddie was memorized and a few times pointed at the screen saying his noise of the moment: "kkkkk." But again as it switched into high-gear with Elmo's World, he started to whine and was then relived as I changed the channel back to classical music. Ahhh. Then he went back to Eddie's World and played with his toys on the door mat, rubbing his feet along its rigid surfaces. He is very tactile, very hands-on, and I so I think the overload of visual stimuli is something he is not ready for. And me either. I guess I am a classicist - Sesame Street to me is the dopey, friendly waddle of Big Bird, the humorous funk of Oscar the Grouch and soothing sounds like 'C' is for Cookie and 'Rubber Duckie.' Today's viewing was more reminiscent of a video game or thriller movie, in terms of its pace and cantor. It undoubtedly disturbed Eddie because I put him down for a nap shortly thereafter and what should have been a nice solid 2 hr. sleep was instead a quick 20 minutes that culminated with full-blown screaming, which is not usually the way he wakes up. I thought maybe he hurt himself up there. Nope, he was fine. He must have just had a nightmare on sesame street.

the cup, revised

2009-11-10T17:50:00.000-08:00

Back in September I shared my sippy cup woes with our blog readers. Well, I am happy to announce that Eddie has successfully been drinking from ALL of his various sippy cups for almost a month now. Throughout the day I fill one of the spill-proof ones with water and leave it somewhere where Eddie can reach it, usually on a bar stool. He finds it, of course, and totes it all around the house that by the end of the day I cannot ever seem to find it. Then during meals I use the Take-n-Toss cups and fill them with milk. He is still not drinking the milk as much as water. And then he always has a sippy cup in the car and seems to drink it while we ride. I guess the reason I feel it is so relevant to talk about the cup is because Eddie never drank from a bottle, and is still breastfed four times a day, so I have worried that he would be dehydrated if I didn't present him with the boob. Even something as simple as drinking, needs to be taught to a baby...so I have realized. Once again, I am glad that he is capable of drinking. Even if it now means he is drinking his bath water too.

Above is a photo of Eddie just being one of the guys, "drinking" with his Uncle Will.

repetito est mater studiorum

2009-11-04T19:00:00.000-08:00

Literally translated as 'repetition is the mother of learning', or more loosely, the more you repeat something, the more you master it. This phrase was iterated by my high school Latin teacher on numerous occasions, specifically before exams to encourage us to memorize conjugations but also randomly as this sort of wise, life lesson sort of advice. I am reminded of it today because I feel no where is this more apparent than in observing a toddler learn. Eddie has been mastering new skills daily, it seems, and he does so by repeating things, sometimes so much he seems compulsive or obsessive. Today he was working on stepping up and down. He wisely has chosen to master this skill in our shower where there is a ledge that is about 6 inches high before entering the shower. So he holds onto the shower door and steps up onto this ledge and steps down into the shower. He then turns around and goes out of the shower. And he repeats this over and over again until distracted by something new. Up until this point any time he encountered a change in elevation, per se, he would stoop down and crawl over the barrier or step, but now he is trying to stay on two feet and actually step up and down. It sounds simple to an adult but it is an arduous task for a baby and quite amazing to watch it in progress.

He also surprised me the other day by finally starting to show genuine interest in blocks beyond throwing and banging them, when he actually stacked them on top of each other. I have been showing him this for months but his only interest in blocks is knocking them down; I keep thinking, what is it about boys that is so destructive? But just the other day he carried five of his alphabet blocks into the bathroom and placed them onto the black and white tile floor and started stacking and un-stacking them. I was so proud. I just stood there for awhile watching with a big grin on my face, and then of course, applauded his efforts. Interesting, it seems like our bathroom is his sort of learning tank.

He is really into moving objects and will take items from one place to another, often from one room to another and then place them on the floor and walk away and then go back and repeat this. I guess this is object permanence learning. The funny thing is when he tries to do this with snacks. I am trying to teach him that if he leaves food on the floor, Marty will eat it. He still seems baffled when the little Bunny Grahams are not on the door mat where he left them.

lots o' leaves

2009-11-02T07:36:00.000-08:00

for my birthday my loving husband got me a new camera...here are some fall shots with the new gear...and now using Flickr to upload photos instead of Picasa. I figured out the problem - had to make all the photos 'public.' The order is random so you will see scenes from a park in Chicago, from our home and also from our weekend at Nonni and Gramps:

it's a great pumpkin...

2009-11-02T06:51:00.000-08:00

Charlie Brown!

We decided to capitalize on Eddie's baldness and dress him as Charlie Brown this year, a simple costume that entailed a $3 shirt which I painted the zig-zag black stripe on and rescuing my old Snoppy doll from my parents' basement and giving him a thorough bath. We didn't take Eddie out Trick-or-Treating officially since there is really no point when he can't walk up steps yet and the candy would go to waste, but he undoubtedly enjoyed the day as he raced to the door every time the bell rang and literally assisted in handing out candy to the kids. His Dad took him to a friend's party briefly - perhaps it would have been for longer but our guy came down with a slight cold on Thursday night so we had to take it easy this weekend. Uncle Will was here for the festivities and we all took turns holding back the barking Marty and opening the door with the candy basket in hand. Our neighborhood gets really into the festivities. The street is blocked off to deter any cars. Every house is decorated with lights, spooky decor and pumpkins. All the adults dress up too - our favorite was our neighbor Bob dressed as a woman - as they walk their kids around and tote a plastic cup filled with libations. And happy to see that many seem to make their kid's costumes. The most popular costume for boys seemed to be Thomas the Train, something all the parents tell me that Eddie will undeniably get into . For girls I saw some characters from our own childhood, including Care Bears, Strawberry Shortcake and a Smurf. Cousin Noah came over for awhile and visited. It won't be long before the boys will be out there together racing from door to door!

watching noah

2009-10-21T18:54:00.001-07:00

This was the last week we regularly watched Noah Wilson during the day. For the past eight weeks we had the pleasure of babysitting my nephew twice a week for a couple hours as my sister had regular appointments. Next week my sister goes back to work, at first part-time and then full-time in November and little Noah will be at daycare. It was a great experience for both Eddie and I, to have another baby and see what it would be like if I had two of my own. There were moments when it felt very natural and I was proud of my guy's ability to play independently. I was conscious of his need for attention and would often sing songs - it seemed to soothe Noah and make Eddie smile. Eddie smiles at Noah. He wants to touch him, pat his head. One time he actually hit Noah's head and Noah made such a sour puss face at him...perhaps an indication of future battles to come. I hope they don't pick on each other. My sister and I won't know how to handle that since our fights were always verbal exchanges of "you poop!" Eddie likes to play with Noah's car seat. And he has enjoyed having his bouncy seat back out of storage - he crawls into it and plays, mostly trying to figure out how to clasp the harness straps.

The most difficult moments came during feedings and naptime. When I was feeding Noah a bottle, Eddie would clamor to be fed too and start to climb in my lap, or at least attempt to. I often had to walk away or leave the room so that Eddie wouldn't see me feeding Noah and get jealous. The other challenge would occur during nap time - when I had to put Eddie down and simultaneously Noah was nearing the sleep stage too. Noah would get cranky and would not want to be put down, and yet Eddie would need his bedtime ritual of a feeding...so I was stuck. Sometimes it felt like dueling banjos, with both of them crying as I would try to set Noah down and he wanted nothing of the sort and yet Eddie would be whining to be picked up too. Noah reminds me a lot of Eddie as a newborn - he is a fairly high needs baby. He is not colicky like Eddie, but he does not go to sleep unassisted. Here I am back on the ball, bouncing a baby to sleep. It feels good to do it again, in a way. To know that I can soothe another baby to sleep. Noah also does not like to be put down for naps, he likes to be held and sleep in your arms. It is that same tricky eggshell battle of trying to put the closed eye baby down onto a bed, with hands still on him to make him feel as though you are still there, and then carefully removing them so as to not wake him...and then Eddie starts babbling and his voice wakes Noah. Ugh. This process continues at least four times before I succeed. Yes. I still have the touch.

a nice sunday

2009-10-20T08:55:00.000-07:00

You turned 14 months on Sunday. It was a beautiful day - finally - a nice autumn day with sunshine and temperatures in the 60s. We spent a lot of the day outside, finishing up the fall yard work. I pulled the tomato plants out, a little saddened as unconsumed green bulbs fell to the ground. We planted way too many seedlings - 8. But it was our first attempt and we learned so much. How those little pants grow so quickly from mere seedlings to bushy fruit bearing structures that tower some 6 ft. high is quite amazing. And as I pulled them from the earth I was marveled at how comparatively small their root system is. And I thought about you, about how much you have grown too. I watched as you played on the deck with your balls and truck, taking in the day, the briskness in the air. I wondered if you are aware of seasons, changes in our environment. Of course we talk about the leaves and the flowers and the weather, but naturally I question your comprehension. Maybe you just recognize that the days are cooler because you are no longer wearing sandals and there is a new hat on your head, a new puffy coat on your arms and a blanket over you on our walks.

You are starting to babble a lot now. More consonants and more syllables but nothing that really translates into a real word. You also communicate a lot by pointing, reaching and whining for things you want. You seem taller these days. Your visual scope is widening as you see something you want high above on the counter or table top and then reach and whine for it when it is out of your reach. When you want to go play in the basement you go over by the door and reach for the doorknob. You are in to regular household objects: any kitchen tools, straws, food in the pantry, any type of bottle or glass, the Swiffer, the humidifier and of course the remote controls and our cell phones. Recently the Swiffer has become your new obsession. You push it around the house, as if you are cleaning, for up to 30 minutes with intense focus. You have figured out how to take the humidifier apart. You can flush the toilet. You are still fascinated by opening any drawer or cabinet. If you are in the bathroom when I open a drawer you will grab a bottle of lotion or hair product and run away with it, laughing. You even reached up to the sink and grabbed the liquid soap the other day. Yesterday you ate a piece of a leaf.

Teeth just keep coming and coming. You have 12 totally in and one incisor that is poking through. So you are still chewing on everything and anything.

Sleep is still sporadically bad...as in, you are waking 3-4 times a night. I am talking to a few different sleep consultants to figure out what to do beyond letting you cry it out. We tried this method one night and after 45 minutes I broke down and retrieved you. It is too hard to let you get it all worked up, stressed and full of snot, especially during flu season, when it feels like I am being selfish - your pain is our gain. I keep thinking that there has to be a reason, a genuine developmental/medical reason why you don't sleep through the night. I keep thinking that it has to be more than just you wanting to be nursed. Are you cold? Do your teeth hurt? Do you have bad dreams? Does your skin itch? Does your tummy hurt? If we only knew.

dancing machine

2009-10-17T19:20:00.001-07:00

Uncle Will stopped in for a visit and taught Eddie how to boggie!

my bookworm

2009-10-17T18:52:00.000-07:00

Eddie has really been into his books lately. When he wakes up from a nap and is set on the floor he often will go straight for his books, pulling them from the ottoman one by one and opening them on the floor, creating a literary mosaic. He pages through them all by himself, as if he is actually reading them. Just like everything, he wants to do it by himself. When you read a book to him he will often push it away and grab another one. This goes on book after book, like a sort of game, until he ultimately climbs out of the chair and onto the floor where he can "read" his books by himself.

a lull

2009-10-14T19:08:00.000-07:00

There's a feeling of a lull here right now. The weather is grey and cold. Grandma Bonnie has left. Uncle Will already dropped in. We are back to our regular routines and feeling a bit down. Marty missed Bonnie's cookies and walks; she has been sort of off and got sick with the gurgy guts and runs this morning - I think she is depressed. Eddie is still showing off his new trick that his Grandma taught him - blowing bubbles. Bonnie did it one night while Eddie was in the bath and since then he has repeated the skill every time he drinks his water out of his cup. It is hilariously cute but makes for a big wet mess. Lulls are okay though...a lull translates to a stress-free existence, and for me right now that is probably exactly what I need since I am recovering from a bad head cold. Once again it seems like I have gotten sick in order to protect my son; I keep thinking that one day he is going to awaken with the same stuffiness that I have and instead, thankfully, he arises bright eyed and bushy tailed, ready to play play play. He seems oblivious to the change of seasons - still wants to play outside all the time. We bundle him up in his new puffy coat - so cute. Can't wait to post some photos on the blog and share his new cuteness with you.

swimmy

2009-10-05T18:02:00.000-07:00

We have been taking Aquababies swimming class for a month now...check out some photos:

and footage

the flow

2009-10-05T17:40:00.000-07:00

Some days things just flow, everything goes according to plan and the day feels somewhat effortless. I have learned to appreciate these days because they are so rare, happening maybe once every couple of weeks. Life with a toddler is constant adaptation, a lesson in patience, flexibility and moment to moment decisiveness. Not to mention life with a corky dog that gets what we call "gurgy guts" in the morning, sometimes won't eat her food and will only go to the bathroom if I accompany her in the yard. So when I found out I had a last minute meeting for a project I am working on at 9 a.m. this morning at my neighbor's house plus plans to do lunch with friends, I was a bit worried that scheduling two things in a matter of hours would backfire and I would have to cancel on at least one of them. But everything went according to plan. Eddie woke up around 7 a.m. and went back down for his morning nap at quarter to 9. Evie came over to babysit while I went to the meeting. I returned around 10:45 and Eddie woke up shortly thereafter. Then after changing his poop (right on schedule) and having a quick lunch, we went to pick up lunch for our friends Hilary and Lauren who both recently had babies. We visited with little Mack and Grace and their mommies and then returned home for our 2 p.m. nap. For the past several days Eddie hasn't been sleeping during his second nap, he just plays in his crib, but today he slept for 45 minutes, allowing me to rest too. And then the rest of the evening just fell into place too with a nice family walk, dinner and bath. Just put Eddie down for bed and hoping he sleeps as well as he did last night - finally, a break from his recent bad habit of waking up so much - last night he only woke up around 10 p.m. for a feeding and then slept through the night. We aren't sure whether it was the addition of his monkey Dangles in his crib, the lightweight tight fitting pjs or the sippy cup with water that aided in his sleep...probably none of the above, just a lucky timing thing. But we repeated these elements tonight and are hoping for the same results. What a difference good sleep makes. I know this and know that the flow of today was no coincidence.

spilt milk

2009-10-04T13:59:00.000-07:00

I started giving Eddie whole milk on his 13 month bday, now almost a month ago. He drinks it from his silver cup with his meals. He doesn't chug it as ferociously as he does his water, he sips it slowly, still trying to figure out what this white stuff that isn't from mommy is. But he does drink small amounts of it. The most annoying part about having him drink milk instead of water all the time is that when it spills, it has to be cleaned up thoroughly otherwise it will smell. We had a dishtowel in the laundry room that reeked like puke and we figured out it must have been used to clean up spilt milk. I was hesitant to give Eddie milk, thinking, why does he need it if he is still breastfeeding? We are the only creature to drink another species' milk. And over 70% of Americans have some form of lactose intolerance. But since he is so lightweight, only in the 25% for his age, I decided that maybe the whole milk instead of water would bulk him up...and help him sleep through the night. Well, he seems like he weighs a tad more but he is still not sleeping through the night. More teeth are exploding in the mouth - so many that I cannot even keep track of which ones they are. So I am hoping that the night waking will get better soon.

the season

2009-09-28T18:06:00.000-07:00

Autumn has always been my favorite season - the foliage, the frost on the pumpkins, chilly days and cozy nights. And it is officially here as I watch the vines on our fence turn from vibrant green to burnt orange, fire engine red and eventually brown. But this year there is another sign that summer is gone and we must shift gears...flu shots. Everywhere I go I feel bombarded by the fear of influenza, or worse, gasp, H1N1. Signs outside of Walgreens have been displaying "flu shots here" for weeks now - there is even an ad on TV for them. And my email has been bombarded with discussions on the topic. Probably the best discussion of the topic I found here on a local blog, and it reinforced my natural instinct to NOT vaccinate Eddie. My pediatrician brought it up at his 12 month well visit back in August. And when I pressed her and asked, "really, what do you think, does Eddie need them?" She sheepishly answered that they are recommending them for all over the age of 6 months...of course because that's what the CDC and AAP are saying they have to say that. But I said I still wanted to think about it. And I have thought about it and feel pretty confident that we are not going to get either shot. Instead I am going to practice a strict regime of hand washing every time we enter the house from being out somewhere and if we have contact with other kids or public places. I will continue to wipe down the shopping carts with disinfecting wipes (I know it sounds silly). And we will be consuming foods rich in omega-3 fatty acids, including salmon and flax seeds. I add flax seeds to our oatmeal now. And I just purchased a new supplement for Eddie that is full of omega 3's and vitamin D, called Eskimo Kids. That's the other big vitamin to push to protect against illness, vitamin D3 - for more info, go here. And I am taking vitamin D daily myself, which, since I am still breastfeeding, means Eddie will be getting extra doses of goodness. We have been very lucky with Eddie's health so far, and I am hoping that continuing to breastfeed and doing these other precautionary measures will mean that he stays healthy this season. Summer, and everything carefree and sunny about it, IS over...and for the first time I am sort of depressed. This is wrong. We should not be living in fear of the flu.

a few of my favorite things

2009-09-19T09:37:00.001-07:00

here are some of my current favorite things:

the soy sauce bottle

playing with the blind cords (a no no that I get away with sometimes when mommy is closely monitoring me)

walking along the side of the house

charging through the house with my blankie

13 months

2009-09-19T09:04:00.000-07:00

Last night as I was uploading some recent photos I started to shed some tears, tears of genuine love, tears of joy coupled with fear, fear that if anything ever happened to my Bomby I don't know what I'd do. He is just so darn fun. Despite his increasing self-agency and expressiveness which often translates to mini temper tantrums or breakdowns fostered by the desire to have something that we deem inappropriate, he is such a joy day in and day out.

He is a little guy. We are not really sure how it happened since his dad was such a big baby and he seems to eat a lot, but he is very active. He has the buff-est baby body I have ever seen. He is a slim jim, a tall drink of water and when I compare him to other babies his age I get a tad concerned, wondering if he will always be so skinny. I am trying to bulk him up by now serving him whole milk with all his meals instead of water - more on milk in an upcoming post. But his one year visit confirmed that he is only 21 lbs. and 30 inches, putting him in the 10th percentile for weight and the 50th for height. He is still in his infant car seat...will be getting the new car seat soon though.

Some of his favorite activities lately include toting his blankie all around the house and waving it around like a red flag in a bull pin, exploring the drain in the shower (still), doing body flops and "jumping" on our bed, playing outside, especially with rocks, anything with water (note, we started swim lessons a few weeks ago and he likes it), grabbing whole fruit from the fruit basket and eating it whole and playing with the soy sauce bottle - I know it sounds weird, but every time I open the fridge he grabs this bottle and carries it all around the house and babbles. If I take it away from him, he throws a fit. So I emptied most of the soy sauce out of it and just monitor that he isn't throwing it or anything causing it to shatter. One day I hid the bottle by placing it on the top shelf and he was so perplexed, looking all over the fridge for it. Too funny. The only thing I can think of is that he is trying to mimic his Dad - he sees him sometimes carrying a beer bottle and talking and so maybe he us trying to replicate that. He seems to be mimicking his Dad all the time now. His Dad roars, he roars. He is making attempts at playing hockey with the little sticks he has, especially after watching his Dad knock stuff around. He even grabs the remote and points it at the TV.

Changing his diaper is still a big struggle. I read recently in the book "Touchpoints" by T. Barry Brazelton that this is typical at this stage in development - that anything you do that prevents their increasing desire to move, especially to stand and walk, can cause them to have a breakdown. I dread diaper time. And getting dressed is something I do as he is on the move. It is a process. But he is showing signs of understanding this process. Yesterday as we were getting dressed to leave the house he actually attempted to put his shoes on by himself.

Walking is a process and as indicated through the video posts on the blog, you can see that he is progressing nicely and is taking more and more consecutive steps. Of course he falls, and of course he still crawls, but he is walking more and more. He seems to like when he has shoes on - must be a different feeling than walking around barefoot.

Verbally he distinguishes from "mama" and "dada" although he often just repeats the syllables so it is more like "ma ma ma ma." He also seems to understand "no" because when he doesn't want to do something, like have his diaper changed or go in his high chair, he shakes his head and says "na na na na."

Gastronomically we haven't introduced to many new foods lately because he is increasingly eating whatever we eat. We are starting to try to eat dinner all together before he goes to bed; this is a goal as the days get shorter and it gets darker earlier, and so that we are not eating dinner after putting him down which after preparing sometimes be after 8/8:30 p.m. I am trying to introduce more proteins and seeds & nuts - he has eaten chickpeas, sesame (ground as tahini), peanut butter, flax seeds, almonds, cantaloupe, plums and grapes this month.

We do swim class once a week, have been going to the park with Niah and have been watching cousin Noah twice a week (more on this in another post). I checked out Gymboree to see if we wanted to sign up for those classes too, but decided to wait until winter when it is too cold to play outside. For now, we are trying to enjoy the nice end of summer/start of fall weather and play outside and go for walks every day.

our stinky monkey

2009-09-18T19:14:00.000-07:00

this scene basically happens every night between dinner and bedtime. Eddie makes a poopy and gets crazy. Check it out:

exhaustion

2009-09-16T18:02:00.000-07:00

Nobody has ever said this to me, but it is something I will surely tell others: parenthood is a state of being able to function amidst exhaustion. I am exhausted. Going on 13 months of interrupted sleep and my body is really starting to break down. Two nights ago Eddie did something he has never done before in the middle of the night - he woke up after being put to bed and wanted to stay up. He wasn't what I would call playful though, he just wanted me to hold him. So I naturally thought that something was wrong, that he was sick, despite having no fever. So I grabbed a blanket and proceeded to sleep in the chair with him. He wanted to sleep on me, but just couldn't get comfortable so I thought I would bring him into our bed. My mind aching with the thought that I could be setting the stage for a dreadful habit...but alas, he was not able to sleep there between the excitement of being by his Dad and Marty and the curiosity of the shadows the ceiling fan made, so back to his room we went. He finally fell asleep on the boob, an hour and a half later, and I placed him in his crib. Last night he luckily did not repeat this behavior, but it was perhaps an even worse night of sleep because he woke up and cried out 4 times. Yes, 4 times. Count them. Went down at 7:30, woke at 11 p.m., again at 12:30, again at 3:30, then for good at 6 a.m., going back down for a nap at 8 a.m. Ridiculous. Like a newborn. I have read that this is common at this age/developmental stage and it is all because of the double-edged sword of independence - they want to be independent and the skill of walking is the the pivotal moment in achieving independence, yet they also want to remain close to you, hence the clingyness that Eddie has exhibited recently, and all the excessive requests for boob. During the day he is still nursing 4-6 times too. And I have been feeling really drained - headaches all the time, faintness, digestive problems. So one thing I did, and probably should have done a long time ago is calculate how many calories I consume on an average day - a breastfeeding woman should consumer somewhere between 1800-2200 and if it drops below 1500 they are at risk for losing their milk supply. I calculated that I consume on average 1200...way too low. So I am trying to eat more and more high calories foods. I am taking prenatal vitamins again too. And I have stopped taking the herbal supplements that were helping to flush out my system which was bogged down by what Chinese medical professionals call "stagnation." It all seemed well and has helped my skin, but what it really was doing was making me go to the bathroom a lot. Not to mention Eddie - he has been averaging three poops a day. Now that I have been off the herbs for four days he has only gone poop once per day.

And I keep thinking, this is how I feel with just one child. What happens when there are multiple? I ask my friend and neighbor Cindi who has three kids how she does it, and as the words fall off my tongue I glance over and realize that she has been drinking a Red Bull throughout our walk to the park. Oh. Caffeine. Lots and lots of caffeine. Being active helps too. I feel much more like a human when we are busy and have plans with other people, as hard as it is to find energy to do so, vs. the days we stay home and lay low. Lounging around might sound recharging but it actually seems to make me even more tired and irritable and, I fear, a lackluster mom.

Now it is almost 8:30. Eddie has been asleep for about and hour and I think I am going to go to sleep too.

discerning palate

2009-09-13T17:49:00.000-07:00

Eddie has always been a good eater but lately, pretty much ever since he turned one, he has become pickier and refuses to eat certain things at certain times. I know this is a typical toddler behavior. The funny thing is that he seems to have a sophisticated, discerning palate because the times when he refuses certain foods is because they just aren't the best. For example, for a week he refused to eat his Cheerios. Then I tasted one and realized why - they were stale. Got a fresh box and he is eating them again. Tomatoes. All summer long he has loved eating cherry tomatoes, especially the Sungold variety from the market. He also eats the Juliets we grow in our backyard. But for a week or so he wasn't eating the Juliets anymore. I tasted one and realized why - they just weren't ripe enough. One night I gave him some diced zucchini and spinach that had been frozen and then thawed in the microwave. He wouldn't touch it. It had freezer-burn. He also doesn't like more than one-day old pasta. And he prefers his peas to be fresh too.

a true blog

2009-09-09T18:49:00.000-07:00

There's so much blogging backed up in my brain...things I have been meaning to write but haven't had the chance to do so. I have even made a little list of "to-blog" entries and have to now go through and actually write them so I can cross them off the list. But now that a have a free moment, my mind is mush. I have 12 minutes before Top Chef starts, so that constitutes a free moment. It is the only show I am committed to these days. Commitments are tough for me. Always have been. And it is even tougher with a baby. Every day I have a game plan of errands, housework and possible social engagements or outings. And often not everything on the game plan gets done. It's okay though. Take today, for example: woke up at 7:15 a.m., picked up Eddie out of his crib as Marty was barking hysterically, her way of telling me she has to go out and go potty or poopy. Took Marty out. Fed Marty. Let Eddie play for awhile before changing his diaper. Fed Eddie. Played more. Put Eddie down for a.m. nap around 9 a.m. Put in load of laundry, washed dishes, washed counter tops, swept the floor, finished putting photos from Maine vacation in an album, worked a tad on Eddie's baby book. At 11 a.m. Eddie woke up and we went to the Farmer's Market. Got home at 12:30 and prepared a quick lunch of tomatoes, bread, peas and a pear. At 12:45 my sister came over to drop off Noah. Babysat Noah until 2:30 - watching Noah is one topic on the "to-blog" list. Evie and Noah left and put Eddie down for a nap. We had swim class at 3:30 but I knew we weren't going to make it. Eddie was literally a mess from eating raspberries at the market, having a quickie lunch right as Noah arrived and playing with beer bottles as I fed Noah his bottle. Talked to Mom. Texted with Carrie. Uploaded some photos. Eddie woke up at 3:17. Nope. Not going to make it to swim class this week. It's okay though. I am less tense about breaking so-called commitments, about missing classes. I know it is money down the tubes, but what are we supposed to do, run out of the house in a frenzy and then stress when there is traffic and we get to the class totally late and miss it entirely? So not worth it. Instead we played out in the backyard, picked tomatoes and watched Marty chase squirrels. Then Dad came home with a bouquet of flowers. Today was our 3 year anniversary. Changed a poopy diaper, went for a walk, ate pasta as a family, then watched Eddie get all amped up over his new walking skills. Changed another poop. Bath. Boob. Beddy. Ah...Top Chef time for me. Good day.

the cup

2009-09-08T18:48:00.001-07:00

I started buying sippy cups when Eddie was about 8 months old. I have purchased four. First it was Phillips Avent's trainer cup, then Born Free's version. Then at the advice of an experienced mom, I tried the Take-In-Toss cups from Target and Munchkin's brand sippy cup which is a simple 3 piece version compared to Born Free's complex system that includes seven components. The problem with all these sippy cups is that they are all "no-spill" style which means the child has to vigorously suck to get any liquid out. I try to drink from them and it practically gives me a headache to suck so hard. Eddie bites on the spouts of the cups a lot and they have proven to be good teethers and nice distraction devices during long car rides. But when I look at the level of the water after he has had it for several minutes I see that he has not consumed a drop. The Take-In-Toss cup is a tad different and more like the old-school style of sippy cup: a simple lid with a spout. But because there are no handles, it is a tad too cumbersome for my 12 month old. The Munchkin one is a cheap version of the new no-spill style cups with only three parts to it - the spout, the handles and the actual cup. It is not a good travel cup as it doesn't have a lid and the spout often does not securely fit into the top, making it liable to leak. He seems to like the spout on the Avent one the best, and it is also the smallest, making it the easiest to handle. So for now it is our sippy cup of choice, even if only as a teether.

Ever since Eddie started eating solid foods I have been giving him sips of water during his meals via a hand-me-down silver baby cup, actually my silver baby cup from years ago. Something that was used for me only on special occassions has become part of Eddie's every meal routine. Well, last week he started to do more than grab and play with the cup and spill the water everywhere - he started to confidently drink from it on his own. Today I gave him his water in a glass demitasse cup and he gingerly drank from that too. So maybe he has circumvented the whole sippy cup/trainer cup phase. He will go straight from breast to cup to SIGG.

first steps

2009-09-04T09:24:00.000-07:00

Eddie has been taking a step or two here and there for the last month, but this week it has progressed to like four or five steps before collapsing back down into the crawl. Check it out:

monkey butt

2009-09-01T19:12:00.001-07:00

We have been really fortunate to have not had a bout of diaper rash...until now. The last two days Eddie's bum has been red and his dad calls it "monkey butt." He has been pooping so much lately; yesterday was four times! I think it is because he eats fruit with every meal and tons of it. Yesterday I swear he ate a half a pint of raspberries and his last poop of the day looked like Smuckers...with seeds. And his bum was all red. I thought it was solely from the raspberries but then this afternoon it was red again. It could be because I am giving him his fruit with the rind on it now. He actually ate a whole apple the other day...just saw me eating one and wanted one too, so I figured, why not see what he does. He ate like 3/4 of it just like he should eat it, around the core and all...it was pretty cool. The new food we have introduced over the past couple of days is peanut butter. So maybe it is the peanut butter bothering his underside. I guess I will stop the peanut butter and see what happens. There is no way I am stopping fruit because he loves it so much and we have so much of it in the house right now. But maybe I will slow down the berry intake!

molar madness

2009-08-26T18:59:00.000-07:00

On the teeth front, first of, I forgot to mention that Eddie got his 8th tooth (the bottom right incisor) around mid-July. Now he is getting his molars in. I have felt the uppers as I was sweeping his mouth after he attempted to eat a rock, and I think I see the lowers coming in because his gums are swollen. Overall his behavior is not too bad as he only has about 2-3 moments a day when he sort of freaks out in pain. He rubs his fist over his mouth or clutches to a toy in his mouth and shakes his head as if he is mad - and I mean mad in the true sense of the term - a little bit crazy, a little bit angry. And he has been a tad needy, wanting to breastfeed more and waking more at night. But the other crazy sign of teething that he has this time around which he has never had before is loose poops. For the last two days he has pooped three times a day and the third one is a tad loose. It is pure nastiness. It is molar madness.

party, morning after

2009-08-26T18:30:00.000-07:00

We celebrated Eddie's birthday here in Chicago this past Saturday with a small afternoon open house and bbq. The weather was a tad on the cooler side for August, in the mid-60's, but luckily comfortable enough to be outside. I chose the theme of "The Hungry Caterpillar" because it is one of Eddie's favorite books and I think the transition from caterpillar to butterfly can symbolize the momentous changes that occur in the first year of life. You can see in the photos how we carried out the theme from the cake to the decor. We further extended the theme by showing Eddie's transformation in year one by putting all of the "Eddie and the Bear" photos on display - who knew the simple gift from Grandma Bonnie and Grandpa Rick, which was delivered to us in the hospital, would have become our measuring stick on Eddie's growth throughout the year. We also hooked the computer up to the tv and had all of our photos of eddie running on a slideshow to one of the playlists I created for his birth. It truly was a tribute to E4.

The guests included Nonni and Gramps, Uncle Mike, Aunt Evie, Cousin Noah, Greg Buth, Tj & Jill Gliha (with baby in utero), Bryce & Hilary Prosser (also with baby on the way), our doula and friend Peyton and her kids Hope, Bowen and Jake, Tommy Carideo with sons Santino and Benicio and our friend from music class Madeline and her mom Debra. The afternoon flew by and Eddie seemed oblivious to the fact that he was the guest of honor. He seemed mesmerized most by the fact that we had our sliding door opened to the deck the whole day and so he kept going back and forth from deck to house and found much pleasure in doing so. Singing 'Happy Birthday' to him did not seem to phase him as he stoically just sat there. And he had no interest in the cake really - after being served a piece he started to cry and wanted out of the high chair. We only opened a few gifts that evening, and of the few opened, the favorite seemed to be the Gumby - coincidentally it's a great teething toy. So we opened the majority of gifts the next morning which had a whole Xmas morning feel to it as Eddie paraded around in his pjs and we watched him play with his new trucks, blocks and all the balloons. He loves his gift from his Uncle Charlie - a duck that waddles around to the tune of "Camptown Races." We will have to take a video of Eddie with this toy because it is hilarious - he dances and mimics it and when it stops he tries to figure out how to turn it on again. All in all it was a nice party. Of course I over stressed myself with all the cooking and preparations but I did have time to enjoy myself and chat with guests. My only regret is that I didn't have the chance to capture more of the day on film, namely our guests. Luckily my sister took some great photos with her new camera which are posted above. Enjoy.