the season

Autumn has always been my favorite season - the foliage, the frost on the pumpkins, chilly days and cozy nights. And it is officially here as I watch the vines on our fence turn from vibrant green to burnt orange, fire engine red and eventually brown. But this year there is another sign that summer is gone and we must shift gears...flu shots. Everywhere I go I feel bombarded by the fear of influenza, or worse, gasp, H1N1. Signs outside of Walgreens have been displaying "flu shots here" for weeks now - there is even an ad on TV for them. And my email has been bombarded with discussions on the topic. Probably the best discussion of the topic I found here on a local blog, and it reinforced my natural instinct to NOT vaccinate Eddie. My pediatrician brought it up at his 12 month well visit back in August. And when I pressed her and asked, "really, what do you think, does Eddie need them?" She sheepishly answered that they are recommending them for all over the age of 6 months...of course because that's what the CDC and AAP are saying they have to say that. But I said I still wanted to think about it. And I have thought about it and feel pretty confident that we are not going to get either shot. Instead I am going to practice a strict regime of hand washing every time we enter the house from being out somewhere and if we have contact with other kids or public places. I will continue to wipe down the shopping carts with disinfecting wipes (I know it sounds silly). And we will be consuming foods rich in omega-3 fatty acids, including salmon and flax seeds. I add flax seeds to our oatmeal now. And I just purchased a new supplement for Eddie that is full of omega 3's and vitamin D, called Eskimo Kids. That's the other big vitamin to push to protect against illness, vitamin D3 - for more info, go here. And I am taking vitamin D daily myself, which, since I am still breastfeeding, means Eddie will be getting extra doses of goodness. We have been very lucky with Eddie's health so far, and I am hoping that continuing to breastfeed and doing these other precautionary measures will mean that he stays healthy this season. Summer, and everything carefree and sunny about it, IS over...and for the first time I am sort of depressed. This is wrong. We should not be living in fear of the flu.

a few of my favorite things

here are some of my current favorite things:

the soy sauce bottle


playing with the blind cords (a no no that I get away with sometimes when mommy is closely monitoring me)


walking along the side of the house


charging through the house with my blankie

13 months

Last night as I was uploading some recent photos I started to shed some tears, tears of genuine love, tears of joy coupled with fear, fear that if anything ever happened to my Bomby I don't know what I'd do. He is just so darn fun. Despite his increasing self-agency and expressiveness which often translates to mini temper tantrums or breakdowns fostered by the desire to have something that we deem inappropriate, he is such a joy day in and day out.

He is a little guy. We are not really sure how it happened since his dad was such a big baby and he seems to eat a lot, but he is very active. He has the buff-est baby body I have ever seen. He is a slim jim, a tall drink of water and when I compare him to other babies his age I get a tad concerned, wondering if he will always be so skinny. I am trying to bulk him up by now serving him whole milk with all his meals instead of water - more on milk in an upcoming post. But his one year visit confirmed that he is only 21 lbs. and 30 inches, putting him in the 10th percentile for weight and the 50th for height. He is still in his infant car seat...will be getting the new car seat soon though.

Some of his favorite activities lately include toting his blankie all around the house and waving it around like a red flag in a bull pin, exploring the drain in the shower (still), doing body flops and "jumping" on our bed, playing outside, especially with rocks, anything with water (note, we started swim lessons a few weeks ago and he likes it), grabbing whole fruit from the fruit basket and eating it whole and playing with the soy sauce bottle - I know it sounds weird, but every time I open the fridge he grabs this bottle and carries it all around the house and babbles. If I take it away from him, he throws a fit. So I emptied most of the soy sauce out of it and just monitor that he isn't throwing it or anything causing it to shatter. One day I hid the bottle by placing it on the top shelf and he was so perplexed, looking all over the fridge for it. Too funny. The only thing I can think of is that he is trying to mimic his Dad - he sees him sometimes carrying a beer bottle and talking and so maybe he us trying to replicate that. He seems to be mimicking his Dad all the time now. His Dad roars, he roars. He is making attempts at playing hockey with the little sticks he has, especially after watching his Dad knock stuff around. He even grabs the remote and points it at the TV.

Changing his diaper is still a big struggle. I read recently in the book "Touchpoints" by T. Barry Brazelton that this is typical at this stage in development - that anything you do that prevents their increasing desire to move, especially to stand and walk, can cause them to have a breakdown. I dread diaper time. And getting dressed is something I do as he is on the move. It is a process. But he is showing signs of understanding this process. Yesterday as we were getting dressed to leave the house he actually attempted to put his shoes on by himself.

Walking is a process and as indicated through the video posts on the blog, you can see that he is progressing nicely and is taking more and more consecutive steps. Of course he falls, and of course he still crawls, but he is walking more and more. He seems to like when he has shoes on - must be a different feeling than walking around barefoot.

Verbally he distinguishes from "mama" and "dada" although he often just repeats the syllables so it is more like "ma ma ma ma." He also seems to understand "no" because when he doesn't want to do something, like have his diaper changed or go in his high chair, he shakes his head and says "na na na na."

Gastronomically we haven't introduced to many new foods lately because he is increasingly eating whatever we eat. We are starting to try to eat dinner all together before he goes to bed; this is a goal as the days get shorter and it gets darker earlier, and so that we are not eating dinner after putting him down which after preparing sometimes be after 8/8:30 p.m. I am trying to introduce more proteins and seeds & nuts - he has eaten chickpeas, sesame (ground as tahini), peanut butter, flax seeds, almonds, cantaloupe, plums and grapes this month.

We do swim class once a week, have been going to the park with Niah and have been watching cousin Noah twice a week (more on this in another post). I checked out Gymboree to see if we wanted to sign up for those classes too, but decided to wait until winter when it is too cold to play outside. For now, we are trying to enjoy the nice end of summer/start of fall weather and play outside and go for walks every day.

our stinky monkey

this scene basically happens every night between dinner and bedtime. Eddie makes a poopy and gets crazy. Check it out:

exhaustion

Nobody has ever said this to me, but it is something I will surely tell others: parenthood is a state of being able to function amidst exhaustion. I am exhausted. Going on 13 months of interrupted sleep and my body is really starting to break down. Two nights ago Eddie did something he has never done before in the middle of the night - he woke up after being put to bed and wanted to stay up. He wasn't what I would call playful though, he just wanted me to hold him. So I naturally thought that something was wrong, that he was sick, despite having no fever. So I grabbed a blanket and proceeded to sleep in the chair with him. He wanted to sleep on me, but just couldn't get comfortable so I thought I would bring him into our bed. My mind aching with the thought that I could be setting the stage for a dreadful habit...but alas, he was not able to sleep there between the excitement of being by his Dad and Marty and the curiosity of the shadows the ceiling fan made, so back to his room we went. He finally fell asleep on the boob, an hour and a half later, and I placed him in his crib. Last night he luckily did not repeat this behavior, but it was perhaps an even worse night of sleep because he woke up and cried out 4 times. Yes, 4 times. Count them. Went down at 7:30, woke at 11 p.m., again at 12:30, again at 3:30, then for good at 6 a.m., going back down for a nap at 8 a.m. Ridiculous. Like a newborn. I have read that this is common at this age/developmental stage and it is all because of the double-edged sword of independence - they want to be independent and the skill of walking is the the pivotal moment in achieving independence, yet they also want to remain close to you, hence the clingyness that Eddie has exhibited recently, and all the excessive requests for boob. During the day he is still nursing 4-6 times too. And I have been feeling really drained - headaches all the time, faintness, digestive problems. So one thing I did, and probably should have done a long time ago is calculate how many calories I consume on an average day - a breastfeeding woman should consumer somewhere between 1800-2200 and if it drops below 1500 they are at risk for losing their milk supply. I calculated that I consume on average 1200...way too low. So I am trying to eat more and more high calories foods. I am taking prenatal vitamins again too. And I have stopped taking the herbal supplements that were helping to flush out my system which was bogged down by what Chinese medical professionals call "stagnation." It all seemed well and has helped my skin, but what it really was doing was making me go to the bathroom a lot. Not to mention Eddie - he has been averaging three poops a day. Now that I have been off the herbs for four days he has only gone poop once per day.

And I keep thinking, this is how I feel with just one child. What happens when there are multiple? I ask my friend and neighbor Cindi who has three kids how she does it, and as the words fall off my tongue I glance over and realize that she has been drinking a Red Bull throughout our walk to the park. Oh. Caffeine. Lots and lots of caffeine. Being active helps too. I feel much more like a human when we are busy and have plans with other people, as hard as it is to find energy to do so, vs. the days we stay home and lay low. Lounging around might sound recharging but it actually seems to make me even more tired and irritable and, I fear, a lackluster mom.

Now it is almost 8:30. Eddie has been asleep for about and hour and I think I am going to go to sleep too.

discerning palate

Eddie has always been a good eater but lately, pretty much ever since he turned one, he has become pickier and refuses to eat certain things at certain times. I know this is a typical toddler behavior. The funny thing is that he seems to have a sophisticated, discerning palate because the times when he refuses certain foods is because they just aren't the best. For example, for a week he refused to eat his Cheerios. Then I tasted one and realized why - they were stale. Got a fresh box and he is eating them again. Tomatoes. All summer long he has loved eating cherry tomatoes, especially the Sungold variety from the market. He also eats the Juliets we grow in our backyard. But for a week or so he wasn't eating the Juliets anymore. I tasted one and realized why - they just weren't ripe enough. One night I gave him some diced zucchini and spinach that had been frozen and then thawed in the microwave. He wouldn't touch it. It had freezer-burn. He also doesn't like more than one-day old pasta. And he prefers his peas to be fresh too.

a true blog

There's so much blogging backed up in my brain...things I have been meaning to write but haven't had the chance to do so. I have even made a little list of "to-blog" entries and have to now go through and actually write them so I can cross them off the list. But now that a have a free moment, my mind is mush. I have 12 minutes before Top Chef starts, so that constitutes a free moment. It is the only show I am committed to these days. Commitments are tough for me. Always have been. And it is even tougher with a baby. Every day I have a game plan of errands, housework and possible social engagements or outings. And often not everything on the game plan gets done. It's okay though. Take today, for example: woke up at 7:15 a.m., picked up Eddie out of his crib as Marty was barking hysterically, her way of telling me she has to go out and go potty or poopy. Took Marty out. Fed Marty. Let Eddie play for awhile before changing his diaper. Fed Eddie. Played more. Put Eddie down for a.m. nap around 9 a.m. Put in load of laundry, washed dishes, washed counter tops, swept the floor, finished putting photos from Maine vacation in an album, worked a tad on Eddie's baby book. At 11 a.m. Eddie woke up and we went to the Farmer's Market. Got home at 12:30 and prepared a quick lunch of tomatoes, bread, peas and a pear. At 12:45 my sister came over to drop off Noah. Babysat Noah until 2:30 - watching Noah is one topic on the "to-blog" list. Evie and Noah left and put Eddie down for a nap. We had swim class at 3:30 but I knew we weren't going to make it. Eddie was literally a mess from eating raspberries at the market, having a quickie lunch right as Noah arrived and playing with beer bottles as I fed Noah his bottle. Talked to Mom. Texted with Carrie. Uploaded some photos. Eddie woke up at 3:17. Nope. Not going to make it to swim class this week. It's okay though. I am less tense about breaking so-called commitments, about missing classes. I know it is money down the tubes, but what are we supposed to do, run out of the house in a frenzy and then stress when there is traffic and we get to the class totally late and miss it entirely? So not worth it. Instead we played out in the backyard, picked tomatoes and watched Marty chase squirrels. Then Dad came home with a bouquet of flowers. Today was our 3 year anniversary. Changed a poopy diaper, went for a walk, ate pasta as a family, then watched Eddie get all amped up over his new walking skills. Changed another poop. Bath. Boob. Beddy. Ah...Top Chef time for me. Good day.

the cup

I started buying sippy cups when Eddie was about 8 months old. I have purchased four. First it was Phillips Avent's trainer cup, then Born Free's version. Then at the advice of an experienced mom, I tried the Take-In-Toss cups from Target and Munchkin's brand sippy cup which is a simple 3 piece version compared to Born Free's complex system that includes seven components. The problem with all these sippy cups is that they are all "no-spill" style which means the child has to vigorously suck to get any liquid out. I try to drink from them and it practically gives me a headache to suck so hard. Eddie bites on the spouts of the cups a lot and they have proven to be good teethers and nice distraction devices during long car rides. But when I look at the level of the water after he has had it for several minutes I see that he has not consumed a drop. The Take-In-Toss cup is a tad different and more like the old-school style of sippy cup: a simple lid with a spout. But because there are no handles, it is a tad too cumbersome for my 12 month old. The Munchkin one is a cheap version of the new no-spill style cups with only three parts to it - the spout, the handles and the actual cup. It is not a good travel cup as it doesn't have a lid and the spout often does not securely fit into the top, making it liable to leak. He seems to like the spout on the Avent one the best, and it is also the smallest, making it the easiest to handle. So for now it is our sippy cup of choice, even if only as a teether.

Ever since Eddie started eating solid foods I have been giving him sips of water during his meals via a hand-me-down silver baby cup, actually my silver baby cup from years ago. Something that was used for me only on special occassions has become part of Eddie's every meal routine. Well, last week he started to do more than grab and play with the cup and spill the water everywhere - he started to confidently drink from it on his own. Today I gave him his water in a glass demitasse cup and he gingerly drank from that too. So maybe he has circumvented the whole sippy cup/trainer cup phase. He will go straight from breast to cup to SIGG.

first steps

Eddie has been taking a step or two here and there for the last month, but this week it has progressed to like four or five steps before collapsing back down into the crawl. Check it out:

monkey butt

We have been really fortunate to have not had a bout of diaper rash...until now. The last two days Eddie's bum has been red and his dad calls it "monkey butt." He has been pooping so much lately; yesterday was four times! I think it is because he eats fruit with every meal and tons of it. Yesterday I swear he ate a half a pint of raspberries and his last poop of the day looked like Smuckers...with seeds. And his bum was all red. I thought it was solely from the raspberries but then this afternoon it was red again. It could be because I am giving him his fruit with the rind on it now. He actually ate a whole apple the other day...just saw me eating one and wanted one too, so I figured, why not see what he does. He ate like 3/4 of it just like he should eat it, around the core and all...it was pretty cool. The new food we have introduced over the past couple of days is peanut butter. So maybe it is the peanut butter bothering his underside. I guess I will stop the peanut butter and see what happens. There is no way I am stopping fruit because he loves it so much and we have so much of it in the house right now. But maybe I will slow down the berry intake!